10 Jokes

  • How do Alaska CB radio operators say "10-4"?

    5-5-2-2."

  • Why is 10 afraid of 7?

    Because 7 8 9

  • How does Rudy Giuliani count to 10?

    He doesn't he skips 1-8 and says 9-11 ten times.

  • Why did 10 die?

    Because it was in the middle of 9 11

  • What do you call an unconscious foot?

    Coma-toes! (I made up this joke when I was 10.)

  • Why did the man that drank 10 cups of poisoned Lipton not die?

    He drank so much poison it built his immuni-tea.

  • What did the bully say when he threw Michael J. Fox out of a 10 story window?

    Marty Mc. FLyyyyyyyyy!

  • Why are promise rings 1/10th the price of engagement rings?

    They only work 10% of the time.

  • What do you rate Megan Fox out of 10?

    Friend: 9 Me: 9? I'll give her one..

  • What do you call 10 lawyers chained to the bottom of the ocean?

    A good start.

  • What's got 8 feet and 10 shoes?

    The McCann Family.

  • Why do you wanna work at Clickbait Enterprises?

    Here's 10 reasons why I should get the job "ok" Number 7 will shock you "You're hired"

  • What do 9 out of 10 people agree on?

    A gangbang

  • What's the difference between a spitter and a swallower?

    10 lbs of pressure on the back of the head.

  • What do you mean, 10?

    10 what Months Weeks !" Doctor: "Nine."

  • How many Blondes does it take to bake chocolate chip cookies?

    10....one to bake the cookies, and 9 to peel the M&Ms

  • What do you call a party with 7 girls & 70 midgets?

    10 books of Snow Whites

  • What is the most simplistic way to get downvoted?

    gt simplistic 10 letters

  • What do you call 10 Mexican kids in a school?

    A construction site

  • Why is 10 traumatized forever?

    Because he was right in the middle of 9-11.

  • What u call 10 black people in the back of a truck?

    A good days hunting.

  • Why was 10 afraid of 7?

    Because 7 (eight) 9

  • What happened to Mr. Chin after all 10 of his children disappeared?

    He developed a ten Chin deficit disorder.

  • How many ants does it take to own an apartment?

    10 . It requires tenants to own an apartment.

  • Why was Yoda afraid of 9?

    Because 10 9 8

  • What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Gary Glitter?

    10 "number 1's" and a not guilty verdict

  • Why did the actor fire his Gorilla agent?

    The big Ape kept wanting to take more than a 10% bite!

  • Why do 9 out of 10 bear moms prefer minivans over sedans?

    All the extra cubholders.

  • Why was 10 scared?

    because he was in the middle of 9-11! Better phrasing recommendations appreciated :-)

  • Why did microsoft go straight to windows 10 ?

    They were trying to keep their german market.

  • How many ladies have you slept with?

    she said. I said, "Do you want me to round it to the nearest 10 " She raised her eyebrows and said, "OK..." I said, "Zero."

  • What do you call a party with 7 girls & 70 midgets?

    10 books of Snow Whites

  • What's the sound that 10 stubby fingers make on a desk?

    Drumpf Drumpf Drumpf Drumpf Drumpf...*

  • Why are 1980 pennies worth more than 1979 pennies?

    Dads joke) The same reason 10 pennies is worth more than 9.

  • Why did the gamer and mathematician cross the road?

    To get to 10.

  • How does Microsoft count to 10?

    1, 2, 3, 95, 98, ME, NT, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10.

  • How did the doctor know Muhammad Ali was dead?

    He never got up by the time he counted to 10 Edit: Phrasing

  • Why did Windows skip to 10?

    Because 7 ate 9.

  • Why do only 10% of men make it to heaven?

    Because if they all went, it would be Hell.

  • Why aren't jokes in base 8 funny?

    Because 7, 10, 11.

  • What do you call 10 lepers in a swimming pool?

    Porridge

  • Why does it take 10 women with premenstrual tension to change a light bulb?

    IT JUST DOES, OK JERK !!!! NOW SHUT UP OR I WILL STAB YOU WITH THE SCISSORS!

  • How much time do I have left, doctor?

    Doctor: 10 Guy: 10 what ! 10 days, 10 months, 10 years Doctor: 9...8...7...6...5...

  • What's the worst part about making out with a perfect 10?

    The cold feeling on your lips when you realize you're kissing the mirror

  • Who are the fastest readers on earth?

    9/11 victims.... They can clear 10 stories in 5 seconds.

  • How do you exorcise a demon?

    Make him run a lap then do 10 push-ups and sit-ups

  • What do you call a group of 10 insects that live in a housing complex?

    Tenants

  • Why do black cats never shave ?

    Because 8 out of 10 cats prefer whiskas !

  • Why did microsoft go directly to windows 10?

    Because windows 7 8 9

  • What do you call 10 rabbits walking backwards?

    A receding hareline

  • Why did Microsoft skip Windows 9 and go straight to 10?

    Because seven "ate" nine.

  • How many balls does Fred have?

    10

  • What's worse than having 10 babies nailed to a tree?

    One baby nailed to 10 trees...

  • How do you fit 10 Amish in a VW Beetle?

    A:Tell them you are going to the livestock auction

  • Why aren't jokes in base eight funny?

    Because 7, 10, 11!

  • When asked which is more important looks or brains?

    9 out of 10 zombies said "braaaaiiiiinnnnssss" number 10 ate the researcher.

  • Why was 10 afraid of 11?

    Because Eleven has crazy superpowers.

  • What do you call a 10 ten old Irish boy who doesn't go to church?

    A virgin

  • What's the difference between windows 10 and the world's biggest virus?

    The Logo.

  • What happened to the number 10?

    It got stuck in 9/11

  • What's the difference between one polar bear and 10 polar bears?

    9 polar bears (joke on a mug at work. lame, ik)

  • What is better than 10 dead babies in a trashcan?

    1 dead baby in 10 trashcans.

  • Why won't Arnold Schwarzenegger upgrade to windows 10?

    Because : he still loves vista,baby!

  • Why can't you tell jokes in base 8?

    Because 7, 10, 11!

  • What is 0.1 as a fraction?

    One tenth " Good, now what does 10% mean "Battery low, plug in your phone " Perfect

  • How did the drunk Irish man lose 30$?

    He bet 10$ on the soccer game and 20$ on the replay.

  • Where do Knights get their armour?

    The hardware store. One I came up with when I was about 10.

  • Whats the difference between a baby and a 10g of cocaine?

    Eric Clapton wouldnt let a bag full of cocaine fall off the window

  • Why is the next Windows version 10 and not 9?

    Because 7 ate(8) 9!

  • Why can't Jamaicans count to 10?

    Because there's a *tree* in the way!

  • What's the difference between a jazz guitarist and a rock guitarist?

    A rock guitarist plays 10 chords for 50,000 people, and a jazz guitarist plays 50,000 chords for 10 people.

  • What do you call 10 rabbits marching backwards?

    A receding hareline.

  • What's it like being a grown up?

    Me hands her money: When we get to the movies, buy a large popcorn. 10: This is only $2 M: Exactly

  • What has 9 arms and 10 legs?

    A Def Leppard.

  • Why are you packing condoms for a sailing trip with 10 guys?

    I'm saying "Just in case." Now I'm traveling with a bigger case.

  • What do you get when you cross 10 sodium particles with the Dark Knight?

    Nananananananananana BATMAN!

  • Why did Microsoft skip straight to 10?

    Because Windows 7, 8, 9. I'll see myself out.

  • Why was math so easy in ancient Rome?

    x always equals 10

  • What was it like?

    Me: What was what like 10: Being alive in the 1900's Me: Go to your room.

  • How many letters can you wear on your feet?

    10 E's

  • How many cats sawed in half does it take to change a lightbulb?

    Apparently 10 aren't enough :

  • How many guns do I have left?

    That's right. 10.

  • What time is it when 10 elephants are chasing you?

    10 after 1

  • Where do you see yourself in 10 yrs time?

    Same as now - in photos and mirrors," I replied

  • Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator?

    A: She couldn't find the 10 key.

  • Why didn't the Romans find algebra very challenging?

    Because X was always 10

  • What does AF mean?

    After Flossing. Now go brush your teeth and they will be clean AF. Why do you ask 10: Mom said you were lazy AF.

  • What do you call 10 black guys playing basketball ball?

    Three on three.

  • What's worse than 10 dead babies in a dumpster?

    1 dead baby in 10 dumpsters

  • What's the difference between a man falling from 100ft and a man falling from 10ft ?

    aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh - SMACK SMACK - aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

  • What do you call an emo a capella group?

    Self Harmony Edit: #10 on /r/all! And thanks for the gold kind stranger!

  • There are 10 types of people in this world...

    Those who understand binary and those who don't

  • Why did 10 go missing?

    Because 9/11.

  • Why didn't the terminator upgrade to windows 10?

    I asked him and he said, "I still love vista, baby!"

  • Why isn't there a Windows 9?

    Hey Microsoft, why is there no Windows 9? You've given us 7 and 8, and now you're skipping straight to 10?" "Well, to be completely honest, 7 8 9."

  • Why was windows 10 afraid of windows 7?

    Because windows 7 8 9.

  • Why wouldn't the worker accept 10 fresh chickens as a reward for saving a farm on fire?

    It was a poultry amount

  • Why is the next Windows version 10?

    Because 7 8 9

  • How many reindeers does Santa Claus have?

    Santa Claus has 10 reindeers according to the song.

  • Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and 7 on a calulator?

    A: She couldn't find the 10 key.

  • What do you call 10 blondes standing ear to ear?

    A wind tunnel.

  • How do spiders drive a van?

    10 on top 10 below Where would you like to go Get in. Get in the Spider Van.

  • Why can't Arabs manage the scoreboards at ball games?

    Because people get nervous when Mohammad starts counting down from 10.

  • Why was 9 afraid of 10?

    Because 10 11 12.

  • What's the difference between a white girl who likes to tan and a burger?

    They both need to be flipped every 10 mins, but only one turns pink when its done.

  • Why did Microsoft skip windows 9 and annouce windows 10?

    Because windows 7 8 9

  • What do you call 10 Ethiopians tied together?

    A raft

  • What do you call a row of 10 blondes standing ear to ear?

    A wind tunnel.

  • What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 black guys?

    A quarterback.

  • Which servant of Jehovah was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible?

    A. Moses. Because he broke all 10 commandments at once.

  • What is Australian cuisine called?

    Prison food

  • What is it called when a spanish man has 10 testicles?

    Diez nuts!

  • What did the tsundere degree say to the radian?

    Notice me 10"

  • What do you call 10 politicians at the bottom of the sea?

    A good start.

  • Why is Microsoft coming out with a windows 10 instead of 9?

    Because 7 8 9

  • What did you do?

    Genocide. You " "I shared a 10 Funniest Autocorrect FAILS on Facebook." - Conversations in Hell

  • What do you call one white guy surrounded by 10 black guys?

    Coach. What do you call one white guy surrounded by 100 black guys Warden.

  • Why was 7 afraid of 8?

    Because 8 nined 10.

  • What has 10 letters and starts with gas?

    Automobile.

  • What's difference between 10 dead babies and Lamborghini?

    I don't have Lamborghini in my garrage

  • Why did Microsoft skip to windows 10?

    Because 7 8 9.

  • What can I bring to your party?

    Friend: A six pack. does 10 crunches cancels

  • How to sink a submarine with 10 blondes in it?

    You knock on the door.

  • What's the integral of 2x with the limits from 10 to 13?

    A good time )