9 Jokes

  • Why did Microsoft skip straight to 10?

    Because Windows 7, 8, 9. I'll see myself out.

  • Why is 9 crying?

    me: Because it's raining and he's getting wet wife: But we're at a water park me *takes a drink from my flask* Yep

  • How many /r/twoxchromosomes posters does it take to change a lightbulb?

    Ten. 1 to screw in the lightbulb, and the other 9 to provide emotional support.

  • What do 9 out of 10 people agree on?

    A gangbang

  • Why is 8 scared of 7?

    Becaauuuussseee 7 8(ate) 9. You get it huh?

  • How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

    10. 1 to change it and 9 to say they could have done it better.

  • Why is Yoda afraid of 7?

    Because 9, 7 8.

  • Why did we skip windows 9?

    Because 7 8 9 I'm so sorry

  • What do you call 5 black guys and a white guy?

    A basketball team. What do you call 9 black guys and a white guy? A baseball team. What do you call 11 black guys and a white guy? A football team. What do you call 100 black guys and a white guy? A cell block

  • When asked which is more important looks or brains?

    9 out of 10 zombies said "braaaaiiiiinnnnssss" number 10 ate the researcher.

  • What did the blonde think of the new computer?

    A: She didn't like it because she couldn't get channel 9.

  • Why did 9 bust 1?

    Because 6 8 9

  • Who is a Project Manager?

    Project Manager is a person who believes that 9 women can deliver a baby in one month.

  • Why was Mel Gibson in a bar at 9am?

    He overslept.

  • Why are 1980 pennies worth more than 1979 pennies?

    Dads joke) The same reason 10 pennies is worth more than 9.

  • What's the difference between one polar bear and 10 polar bears?

    9 polar bears (joke on a mug at work. lame, ik)

  • What do you rate Megan Fox out of 10?

    Friend: 9 Me: 9? I'll give her one..

  • Why is the next Windows version 10 and not 9?

    Because 7 ate(8) 9!

  • Why did Microsoft skip windows 9 and annouce windows 10?

    Because windows 7 8 9

  • Whatcha watching?

    Me: Tiny Houses. 9: Wow it's tiny! Who's gonna live there Me: Two people. 9: Are they married Me: Not for long.

  • Why did Microsoft go straight to Windows 10 and skip 9?

    Because Windows 8 9.

  • Why was 9 afraid of 10?

    Because 10 11 12.

  • Why did they skip 9?

    Because, 7 8 9...

  • Where's my Spiderman costume?

    I want to wear it to the science museum "In your closet, why " 9: DUH. To attract radioactive spiders!

  • What are you going to be for Halloween dad?

    me: Drunk 9: What's mom gonna be me: Mad

  • Why did Windows skip 9?

    Because 7 ate 9.

  • What's worse than a white guy walking into a church andshooting 9 black people?

    He let the others get away... I feel I'll be downvoted to hell for this...

  • What kind of insects to secret agents like?

    as told by my 9 yr old) Spiders.

  • Why is 6 afraid of 9 on New Years Eve?

    Because 9, 8, 7....

  • What has 9 arms, 7 legs, 4 heads, and 13 feet?

    The finish line of the Boston Marathon.

  • What did 6 say to 9?

    Baby! Let's do a 69. Hahaha XD

  • What is up with 1, 3, 5, 7, 9?

    I can't even...

  • Why is 11 afraid of 9?

    Because ten, nine ate!

  • What has 9 letters and makes everyone mad?

    Clickbait

  • Why was 9 afraid of 20?

    28 29's

  • Where do lightning bolts go on dates?

    To cloud 9

  • How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

    10. 1 to change it and 9 to say they could have done it better.

  • When I bring you breakfast in bed, why can't you just say "thank you"?

    instead of all this "how did you get in to my house " calling 9-11 business.

  • Why do 9 out of 10 bear moms prefer minivans over sedans?

    All the extra cubholders.

  • Why is the pH of a white girl either 9, 11 or 13?

    1. She's basic. 2. She literally can't even.

  • Why is Microsoft coming out with a windows 10 instead of 9?

    Because 7 8 9

  • Why was Yoda afraid of 9?

    Because 10 9 8

  • What do u call a lesbian with 9in fingers?

    Well hung.

  • Why does windows 9 not exist?

    Because 7 8 9.

  • How many Blondes does it take to bake chocolate chip cookies?

    10....one to bake the cookies, and 9 to peel the M&Ms

  • How long does it take a black woman to poo?

    9 mouths

  • How many times does 43 go into 9?

    The priest won't tell you, but *he knows*.

  • Why was 6 afraid of 9?

    Because 9 was still alive.

  • What does a 9 volt battery, and a pretty girls bumhole have in common?

    People tell you not to, but you're still going to put your tongue on it.

  • What do you call a Pho restaurant run by 9 Japanese chefs?

    Pho Kyuu EDIT: No one understands how to pronounce "Pho". ;;

  • How many Buzzfeed writers does it take to change a lightbulb?

    13\. Number 9 will shock you!

  • What do you get when you sit on a potato?

    A potato wedge! (I made this up when I was 9)

  • Why is Microsoft going straight to Windows 10?

    Because 7.. 8.. 9

  • Why did Microsoft skip windows 9?

    Because 7 ate 9

  • What does a donkey say?

    It says "Hey Shrek, whats up?" (I was 9 when i made this okay)

  • Why was 10 afraid of 7?

    Because 7 (eight) 9

  • What has 9 arms and 10 legs?

    A Def Leppard.

  • Why was 9 mad at 0 after winning a game of bingo?

    Because 0 1 2