Africa Jokes

  • Why are there no elderly people in Africa?

    They all die when they turn aidy.

  • What do you call a group of medical professionals who navigate around the Horn of Africa without being accosted by pirates?

    Doctors without boarders.

  • Why is Pokemon quite realistic?

    Because in the games, Bug-types are effective against Dark-types. Just like malaria in Africa.

  • How do you make a rave party in Africa?

    You stick a piece of bread on the ceiling.

  • What do they call the Hunger Games in Africa?

    Tuesday.

  • How do parents in Africa celebrate their kid's first birthday?

    They bring flowers to his grave.

  • Why is Africa hot?

    Because of dat Djibouti.

  • Why ebola medicine doesn't work in Africa?

    Because it can't be taken on empty stomach

  • Whats the most common breakfast in Africa?

    Ebola cereal!

  • Where do men have the most curly hair?

    In Africa

  • Why are there so few casinos in Africa?

    Too many cheetahs

  • What is the most positive thing in Africa?

    HIV

  • What do you call a Five Guys restaurant in Africa?

    3 Guys

  • Why hasn't Africa ever won Olympic gold in basketball?

    Because Africa isn't a country.

  • Where'd you get it?

    Africa," says the parrot.

  • Whats the most popular breakfast food in Africa?

    Ebola cereal!

  • Why was the baby in Africa crying?

    It was having a mid-life crisis.

  • What is large and grey and shoots tourists in Africa?

    An elefanatic, of course.

  • Where'd ya get it?

    The parrot says, "Africa." (I don't know if you know this one, but I just heard it today)

  • What's the advantage of being black in Africa vs black in America?

    Nobody can point at your shoes and say "What are thoooooooooose?!"

  • What do they call the lottery in Africa?

    Celebrity adoption.

  • What do you call 100 black people on a plane to Africa?

    A good start.

  • What do you call poppies from eastern Africa?

    Ethiopium

  • Why do androids go to Africa to party?

    Because Botswana have fun.

  • Where do people have the curliest and blackest hair?

    In Africa.

  • Why are the sheep in Africa coloured pink?

    The elephants are using them as tampons

  • Why can't black people swim?

    Because there is no water in Africa.

  • Why do people smile in Africa?

    So they won't run into each other in the dark.

  • Where'd you get him?

    The parrot replies, "Africa".

  • How do you find the fastest man in Africa?

    Roll a penny down a hill.

  • What did one cracker say to the other?

    Let's conquer the Americas, Africa, Australia, and Asia."

  • Where do girls have the curliest hair?

    Africa.

  • Why is gambling not allowed in Africa?

    Because there are too many cheetahs.

  • What are all sports in Africa called?

    The hunger games

  • What's worse than being a tanning salon owner in Africa?

    Being a Somali Uber driver in Columbus, Ohio.

  • What's the most dangerous animal in Africa?

    Black people. (Slightly Racist I know)

  • Why don't they have Oktoberfest in Africa?

    Because nobody there is much of a drinker.

  • Why shoudn't you play poker in Africa ?

    Because of all the Cheetahs!

  • Why can't Africa have Volkswagen beetles?

    Because an elephant will screw anything with a trunk in the front. Thanks to a random guy outside of a 7/11.

  • Why is there such a shortage of teachers in Africa?

    Teacher's aides

  • What do German women's lingerie and Africa have in common?

    Ze-bras!

  • What is the difference between a poker card and Africa?

    The sooner is the Ace of Spades and the latter, a Space of AIDS.

  • Why wasn't toto as excited as dorothy when they traveled the yellow brick road?

    he missed the rains down in africa

  • What do u call 1,000 black people on a plane back to Africa?

    A good start.

  • Whoa, cool. Where did you get him?

    The parrot says, "Africa! There are loads of them running around!"

  • Why are people afraid to play poker in Africa?

    Too many Cheetahs.

  • Why is it considered socially wrong to make fun of a crying 10-year old boy in Africa?

    Because it's normal to undergo a midlife crisis.

  • How many seconds are there in a day in Africa?

    Seconds? They barely get firsts!

  • Which one is closer, Sun or Africa?

    Teacher: Which one is closer, Sun or Africa Johnny: Sun Teacher: Why Johnny: We can see the sun all the time, but can't see Africa.

  • Why shouldn't you gamble in Africa?

    Too many cheetahs..

  • Why is there no gambling in Africa?

    Too many cheetahs.

  • Why is China so politically in bed with Africa?

    Because China is the biggest coal burner in the world

  • What do you call gigabytes in Africa?

    They can't afford computers in Africa.

  • Why did the toy company stop donating toys to kids in Africa?

    Because it's pretty depressing to have a Tamagotchi that'll out-live you.

  • Where did you get it?

    Africa" Says the parrot.

  • Why isn't there gambling in Africa?

    Too many cheetahs.

  • Why is Africa so bad at cricket?

    Because they only have Ebola!

  • Why Did the Ebola Patient Cross the Road?

    Trick question. There are no roads in Africa.

  • Where did you get that thing?

    Parrot says, "Africa."

  • What do you call a vehicle with no fuel in Africa?

    Outtagascar