Ant Jokes
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Why can't ants get sick?
Because they have little anty-bodies.
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What do you call an ant with frog's legs?
An antphibian.
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What do you call an ant with five pairs of eyes ?
Antteneye !
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What kind of medicine do Ants use when they have eye problems?
Ant-Eye Biotics (Dad joke, I know)
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Where do ants go for their holidays ?
Frants !
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What does the Pink Panther say when he steps on an ant?
Dead ant, dead ant, dead ant dead ant dead ant dead ant dead annnnnntttttttt Courtesy of my little cousin.
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When two ants want to run away and get married, who do they seek for help?
The Antelopes.
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Who loves hamburgers French fries and ants?
Ronald MacAardvark!
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What do you call two ants running away?
Antelope!
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Why do ants rarely, if ever, get sick?
Because of their tiny little anty bodies.
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What kind of Ant lives in rented accommodation?
Tenants.
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When is an aardvark jumpy?
When he's got ants in his pants!
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What do call an ant that helps you with your taxes?
An account-ant.
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What do you call an ant who likes to be alone ?
An independant !
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What insect is the Wood Ant related to?
The Should Ant and the Could Ant.
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Why don't ants get sick?
Because of their tiny little anty bodies
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Why was the ant so confused?
All of if its uncles are aunts!
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What did Pink Panther say when he stepped on Ant?
Nothing, Pink Panther doesn't talk!
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How big was the ant when it knocked over the table?
giANT!!
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Where do ants keep their armies?
in their sleevies
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Why does mama aardvark call her husband a cannibal?
Because he ate his ant for dinner!
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Why do elephants hide behind trees?
To trip ants.
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What do you get when you have an ant with 8 legs?
An uncle that has to build a bigger shoe closet...
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What did the Pink Panther say when he stepped on an ant?
Dead ant. Dead ant. Dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead ant, dead annnnnnnnttt.
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What do you get if you cross some ants with some tics ?
All sorts of antics !
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What does a panther say when it steps on ants?
ded-ant.. ded-ant.. ded-ant dedan deadANT dedandead-annnnnt # d-d-d-deadant.
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What do you call an ant from overseas ?
Impartant
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What do you call an ant in space ?
Cosmonants & Astronants !
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Why doesn't the ant ever get sick?
He has lots of antibodies.
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How do ants hide from aardvarks?
They disguise themselves as uncles!
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What did Pink Panther say when he stepped on an ant?
Dead Ant, Dead Ant....Dead Ant, Dead Ant, Dead Ant...
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What do you call an ant that's walking in perfect form?
An informant
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What kind of ant can count?
An account*ant*.
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How many ants does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A light bulb weighs about 50g and a single ant can lift about .2g, so it takes somewhere around 250 ants working together.
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What was the aardvark's favorite Lady Gaga song?
Just Ants. Credit: My friend, the PUNisher.
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Why were the ants dancing on top of the jar of jam?
It said "twist to open"
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Why is it forbidden for ants to go in a church?
They are in-sects
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?
Antelopes
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What did the aardvark say to Noah?
What do you mean you only brought two ants!
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How many ants does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Only two, but you've got to wonder how they climbed up there!
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Why won't you loan a neighbor a cup of sugar?
sigh "You're a pile of ants wearing a bathrobe." bathrobe sags dejectedly
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How many ants are needed to fill an apartment?
Ten-ants
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Why are all ants British?
Because they colonize.
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What do ants drink?
Tea. It's an ant tea joke.
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Why did the dinosaur walk on two legs?
To give the ants a chance.
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Why was the baby ant so confused?
Because all of his uncles were ants!
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What's the difference between an ant and a bird?
A bird can fly.
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Why do aardvarks like to talk to ants?
They can stick to the subject!
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How can you tell an ant is a boy or girl?
Throw it in water If it sinks = girl ant If it floats = buoyant
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What kind of ants are very learned ?
Pedants !
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How many ants can you fit inside an apartment ?
Ten-ants !
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What do you call an ant who skips school ?
A truant !
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What do you call ants in your syrup?
Maple flakes From my well intentioned girlfriend
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How do you sort out Ant and Dec?
Squash one and deal with the other later.
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Why don't ants go to church?
Because they are insects.
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How many ants does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A light bulb weighs about 50g and a single ant can lift about .2g, so it takes somewhere around 250 ants working together.
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What do you call a really really big ant?
A GIANT! Now what do you call a baby ant an Infant! What do you call an ant thats into business A Merchant! please post more ant jokes if you know of any.
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How many ants are needed to fill an apartment ?
Ten ants !
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What did the ant say when he walked into the insurance office?
Insure ants?
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What's worse than ants in your pants?
Uncles
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How many ants does it take to fill an apartment?
Ten ants (Tenants)
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What did the pig say when he found a line of ants in his trough?
Mmm. Canapes."
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Which ant is the biggest?
Elephant
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What do you call an ant who can't play the piano ?
Discordant !
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How many ants does it takes to fill an apartment?
Ten-ants
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What kind of ant can you colour with ?
A crayant !
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How many ants does it take to own an apartment?
10 . It requires tenants to own an apartment.
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What's the difference between a moose and an ant?
A: A moose has antlers, but an ant doesn't have mooselers.
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What are ants called when they run away very fast to get married?
Ant-elopers.
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Why did the ants dance on the jam jar?
A: The lid said, "Twist to open."
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Why aren't ants going to church?
Because they are in sects.
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How many ants does it take to rent a house?
Doesn't matter, ants can't rent a house