Attempt Jokes

  • What did the newly paroled French prisoner name his restaurant?

    Attempted Crepe

  • What is "attempted theft" exactly?

    I mean it's not like you see school librarians seeing a student use Wikipedia on one of the computers and puts them in detention for "attempted plagiarism"

  • What would you tell someone who is attempting to steal your cheese (hint: not "nacho cheese")?

    Leave my provolone!

  • Why did the crowd watch the man futily attempt to blend oil and water for hours on end?

    It was unmiscible.

  • Why should a midget not attempt to slaughter a cow?

    The steaks are just too high.

  • What's it called when a cow attempts to jump a barbed-wire fence?

    An udder disaster

  • How many bodies do you have buried there?

    My attempts at small talk.

  • What do you call attempting to jump to light speed before checking the Hyper Drive first?

    A Wookie mistake!