Baker Jokes
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What did the baker say when he saw the beautiful woman?
I think I'm in loaf." Ba dum, tss.
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What did the retires baker say to the Dough on the table?
I don't knead you anymore.
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Why do bakers work so hard?
Because they knead the dough.
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What did the baker name her dog?
Pido.
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Why did the baker have smelly fingers?
Because he kneaded a poo.
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What does the baker turned counterfeiter say?
I make my own dough". My sister Katie came up with this one.
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What do you call a baker with red hair?
A ginger bread man
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Why did the baker have so many customers?
He desperately kneaded the dough!
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What did the baker say about her co-worker who never sleeps and always smells funky?
At yeast he's a fungi.
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What do you call a red-headed baker?
A Ginger-bread man
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Why/How do bakers work?
They knead the dough.
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What is the difference between a baker baking a cake and a gynecologist giving an exam?
A few degrees.
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What did the baker say to the baby lamb who stole his dough?
Oh baby ewe...you got what I knead!"
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What do you call a confused baker?
I dough know.
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Why did the baker rob the bank?
He needed the dough.
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Why did the baker get smelly fingers?
Because he needed a poo.
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What's the best part of a baker's body?
Their buns.
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Why was the baker happy when his pie caught fire in the oven?
He was a pieromaniac.
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Why did the baker bake more bread?
A: He kneaded the dough.
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Why did the former fitter turned baker enter the lottery?
To win dough.
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What does a baker wear on his feet?
Loafers.
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Why did the baker's hands smell?
Because he kneaded a poo.
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What does a racist baker exclaim?
white flour!
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How do you impress a baker when you're taking his daughter on a date?
Bring her flours
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Why did the baker's hands stink?
Because he needed a crap.
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What do you call a baker who doesn't make bread?
I don't dough!
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What did the unused dough say to the baker?
Why don't you knead me
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Why did the Baker rob the Banker?
Cause he knead that dough. ........ Sorry I'm drunk
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Why was the Baker a part-time drug dealer?
Because he really kneaded the dough. (please forgive me for that awful pun)
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What did the Jamaican Priest say to the Baker's rolls?
You a cinnamon.
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Why does the baker have so many loaves?
Because they bred.
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Why were the bakers hands brown?
Because he kneeded a poo
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Why did the baker... Why did the baker have dirty hands?
Because he kneaded a poo.... HAHAHAHA
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What did the dough say to the baker?
You, knead me.
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What do you call a redneck family of bakers?
Inbread!
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Why did the baker go to work?
He kneaded the dough!
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Who did the baker bring to work?
His doughter.
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What does a baker say when he/she makes a mistake?
Dough!"
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Why did the baker rob the deer park?
He kneaded the doe. (Doesn't work too well in text)
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How can you tell that a baker's hands are on fire?
He can't seem to *stop droppin' rolls*.
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Why did the Baker keep going to the ATM?
He kneaded the dough
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Why do bakers go into business?
Because they knead the dough
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Why did the baker only date large breasted women?
Because he kneaded them.
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How do most bakers get their start in the industry?
They knead dough
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Why does the baker bake?
Because he kneads the dough.
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Why did the baker have brown hands?
He was kneading a poo.
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What's a baker's biggest fear?
Something going a-rye while they're raisin' bread.
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How did the baker put his opponent in checkmate?
with an en croissant
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What did the soccer player shout to the baker who's cakes kept sticking to the tin?
LINE IT!"
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Why do bakers start working so early in the morning?
Because they knead dough.
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What did the baker say to the dough before he put it in the oven?
You are no longer kneaded."
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What did the baker say after he found the dough he had lost?
That's just what I kneaded!
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What happens when doughnuts join a sorority?
They have to go through the glazing. I'm sorry I'm a baker it just came to me... Pun-ishment is in order.