Cocaine Jokes

  • Why did the boxer sprinkle cocaine on his exercise rope?

    He wanted to practice the rope-a-dope.

  • What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a baby?

    Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out a window.

  • What is the difference between a 2 year old and a bag of cocaine?

    Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out a window.

  • What's the difference between a 4 year old and a bag of cocaine?

    Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window. Too soon

  • What is the difference between a bag of cocaine and a four year old?

    Eric Clapton wouldn't drop a bag of cocaine out the window

  • How is credit like cocaine?

    Everyone just needs 1 more line.

  • What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a 4 year-old child?

    Eric Clapton never would have let his bag of coke fall out of a 49th-story window!

  • How did you prepare for today?

    red carpet question with "Cocaine and sit ups." #GoldenGlobes

  • Whats the difference between a baby and a 10g of cocaine?

    Eric Clapton wouldnt let a bag full of cocaine fall off the window

  • Where do you hide cocaine in orphanage?

    Right under the children's noses

  • What's the difference between a bindle of cocaine and a baby?

    Eric Clapton wouldn't let one fall out the window

  • What's the difference between a four year old and a baggie of cocaine?

    Eric Clapton wouldn't let a baggie of cocaine fall out the window.

  • What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a small child?

    Eric Clapton would never let a small bag of cocaine fall out of a window.

  • What's the difference between a bag of cocaine & a small child?

    Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window...

  • What do you get when when you mix cocaine and LSD?

    Time

  • What's the difference between a baby and a kilo of cocaine?

    Eric Clapton wouldn't let a kilo of cocaine fall out of a window.

  • How does the drug addict know the cocaine is good quality?

    He just nose. All credit to my BFF

  • What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a 4 year old?

    Eric Clapton wouldn't drop a bag of cocaine out a window

  • What do you call a midget that does cocaine?

    A low blow

  • What are the similarities between Cocaine and Gain detergent?

    A:With both of them you go sniff sniff hooray!

  • Why couldn't the police arrest the drug dealer?

    Because the evidence was under their noses (They sniffed the cocaine)

  • What's the difference between an 8 year old and a big bag of cocaine?

    Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall off a balcony

  • Why should you tell bad jokes to cocaine addicts?

    Because they'll crack up anyways

  • What's the difference between a small child and a bag of cocaine?

    Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window.

  • What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a four-year old child?

    Eric Clapton never would have let his bag of coke fall out of a 49th-story window!

  • What is the difference between a bag of cocaine and a toddler?

    Eric Clapton won't let a bag of cocaine fall out of the window.

  • How do you keep your Thanksgiving guests from falling asleep on your couch?

    Infuse the gravy with cocaine.

  • What's the difference between a toddler and a bag of cocaine?

    Eric Clapton would let a bag of cocaine fall out the window.

  • What do you get when you mix chocolate milk and cocaine?

    Ovalsheen. Credit goes to my cousin on this one.

  • Whats the difference between a baby and a bag of cocaine?

    Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window.

  • Whats the difference between a dead baby and a bag of cocaine?

    Eric Clapton never lost a bag of coke out the window.

  • What's the difference between a four year old and a bag of cocaine?

    Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out a window.

  • What's the difference between a 5 year old kid and a bag of cocaine?

    Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out the window.

  • What is the difference between a baby and a bag of cocaine?

    Eric Clapton would NEVER drop a bag of cocaine.

  • Why is cocaine the alt-right's favorite drug?

    White powder!

  • What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a 4-year old child?

    Eric Clapton never would have let his bag of coke fall out a 53rd-story window!

  • What is the climax to a telephone receptionist who is on cocaine ?

    A second line

  • What do you call someone who sneezes doing cocaine?

    A snowblower

  • What's the difference between a four-year-old and a bag of cocaine?

    There's no way Eric Clapton would let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window!

  • What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a toddler?

    Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window.

  • Why did Johnny Cash have the Cocaine Blues?

    He ran out of cocaine.

  • How many Sigmund Freud's does it take to change a light bulb?

    A: Cocaine.

  • What do you get when you mix a boxer and cocaine?

    A punchline

  • What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a seven year old?

    Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out the window. EDIT: Damn it he was four

  • Whats the difference between a bag of cocaine and a 4 year old?

    Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window

  • What is the difference between an ounce of cocaine and an infant?

    Eric Clapton would absolutely NEVER let an ounce of cociane fall 49 stories out a window onto the streets of New York.

  • What's the difference between a 4 year old boy and a bag of cocaine?

    Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out a window.

  • What's the difference between a baby and a big bag of cocaine?

    Eric Clapton would NEVER let a big bag of cocaine fall out a window!