Dead Baby Jokes

  • Whats the problem with running through a field of dead babies?

    Your erection....

  • Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini?

    I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

  • What's the difference between a truck full of dead babies and a truck full of bricks ?

    Only one can be emptied with a pitchfork.

  • How many dead babies does it take to paint a room?

    Depends on how you throw (idk if this is a repost)

  • What is the difference between an art student and a dead baby?

    The dead baby can feed a family of four.

  • What's funnier than a crying baby?

    A dead baby.

  • What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon?

    Well the first noticeable difference is that the watermelon tastes better.

  • Whats the difference between a dead baby and a black man?

    A dead baby can feed a family of four

  • What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a convertable?

    I keep one in my garage and one in my closet. Edit:typo.

  • What's worse than a plastic bag filled with dead babies?

    Nickelback

  • What's worse than finding a dead baby in the garbage can?

    Finding a dead baby in the recycle bin.

  • What's worse than a Jimmy John's full of dead babies?

    A Subway full of live ones.

  • What's the difference between a redditor and a dead baby?

    The redditor never gets gold

  • How did the dead baby get across the road?

    Me: How Her: It was stapled to the chicken. Me: .....

  • What's the hardest thing about finding a dead baby on the beach?

    Hiding the erection.

  • What do Beethoven's 9th and a dead baby have in common?

    They're both D-composed.

  • What's the difference between a Ferrari and a box of dead babies ?

    I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

  • What's the difference between a bag of sugar and a dead baby?

    I don't use sugar in my signature cookies.

  • Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies?

    You can't use a pitchfork on the bowling balls.

  • What's the best thing about a dead baby?

    The aftertaste.

  • How many dead babies can fit inside a Bio-dumpster?

    16

  • What's 18 inches long, and makes a woman scream the entire night?

    Her dead baby.

  • What do you call a dead baby hanging on a wall?

    Art

  • What's the hardest part about walking through a field of dead babies?

    My erection.

  • What's harder than nailing 10 dead babies to a tree?

    Nailing one dead baby to 10 trees.

  • What's worst than a dead baby in a trash can?

    A dead baby in three trash cans.

  • What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a corvette?

    I don't have a corvette in my garage.

  • What's the difference between a trampoline and a dead baby?

    You take your boots off to jump on a trampoline.

  • What is the difference between a dead baby and a water melon?

    One's fun to hit with a sledge hammer, the other one's a water melon.

  • What's the difference between Isaac Newton and the dead baby in my microwave?

    Isaac Newton died a virgin

  • Whats red, white, and hangs from a telephone pole?

    A dead baby shot out of a snowblower.

  • What is worse than a dead baby in a garbage bag?

    A dead baby in two garbage bags.

  • What's even worse than five dead babies in a dustbin?

    One dead baby in five dustbins.

  • What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a dead baby?

    I don't have a Lamborghini

  • How many dead babies do you need to paint a wall?

    Depends on how hard you throw them

  • Why did the dead baby cross the road?

    It was attached to my bumper...

  • How do you paint a wall with dead babies?

    It depends how hard you throw them.

  • What's the difference between a dead baby and a Porsche?

    I've never been inside a Porsche. Nor do I have 12 Porsches in my garage.

  • Whats the difference between a dead baby and a bag of cocaine?

    Eric Clapton never lost a bag of coke out the window.

  • What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a trampoline?

    I take my boots off to jump on the trampoline.

  • How many dead babies can you fit in a phone booth?

    78.5

  • What's the difference between a Porsche and a trash bag full of dead babies?

    I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

  • What's the difference between babies and love?

    Love doesn't burn. What's worst part about making love to a dead baby. Digging up the coffin. How long does take to play hide and seek with a dead baby? It depends how small the pieces are.

  • What's worse than seven dead babies in a trash can?

    One dead baby in seven trash cans. What's your dead baby joke

  • How do you find an alive baby in a pile of dead babies?

    With a pitchfork!

  • What's funnier than a dead baby?

    Dead baby in clowns costume.

  • What's the difference between a dead baby and a dead gorilla?

    There aren't any dead babies at the Cincinnati Zoo.

  • What's the difference between a dead baby and mistletoe?

    I don't hang mistletoe at Christmas time

  • What's the difference between a redwood and a dead baby?

    A redwood won't fit in a wood chipper.

  • What's the difference between a dead baby and my ex-girlfriend?

    There isn't one...

  • What do you get when you throw a dead baby off a cliff?

    A pleasant erection

  • Why are bad jokes like dead babies?

    Usually, something went wrong with the delivery.

  • What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies?

    I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

  • What's the difference between a truck load of babies and a truck load of bowling balls?

    There's only one you can unload with a pitchfork. Edit: Who said something about dead babies?

  • What is worse than a dead baby in a trash can?

    A dead baby in 6 trash cans.

  • Whats easier than stealing candy from a baby?

    Stealing candy from a dead baby.

  • Whats the difference....?

    What's the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

  • What diapers should you put on a dead baby?

    Pamperspired.

  • What's better than swinging a dead baby around a tether pole?

    stopping it with a shovel

  • How many dead babies does it take to fill up my house?

    One more.

  • How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb?

    Apparently not 8

  • What is worse than finding 100 dead babies in a trash bin?

    Finding 1 dead Baby in 100 trash bins.

  • How many dead babies does it take to confuse a blond woman?

    to get to the other side....

  • What's more fun than swinging a dead baby by a string?

    Stopping it with a shovel!

  • What's the difference between a Mercedes and a bunch of dead babies?

    I don't have a Mercedes in my garage.

  • What's worse than one dead baby nailed to ten trees?

    One live baby nailed to ten trees.

  • What's worse than a dead baby nailed to a tree?

    The holocaust

  • What do you call a dead baby with a yeast infection?

    a quarter pounder with cheese.

  • What's worse than 16 dead babies nailed to a tree?

    One dead baby nailed to 16 trees.

  • What's 12" long, rock hard in the morning, and makes a woman cry?

    A dead baby.

  • What's the difference between a million dollar car and a pile of dead babies?

    There's no million dollar car in my garage.

  • What's worse than ten dead babies nailed to a tree?

    One dead baby nailed to ten trees.

  • What is the difference between sack of dead babys and ferrari ?

    I don't have Ferrari in my garage.

  • What's the difference between a dead baby and a Styrofoam cup?

    A dead baby doesn't harm the atmosphere when you burn it.

  • What's the difference between a bag of dead babies and a mercedes?

    I don't have a mercedes in my garage!

  • What's the difference between a Cadillac and a pile of dead babies?

    I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

  • Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari?

    I dont have a ferrari in my garage.

  • What do you call a dead baby ,who fights crime?

    Miscarriage of Justice

  • What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies?

    I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage I do realize this is a sick joke but it still makes me laugh when I hear it. I'm a horrible person

  • How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall?

    Depends on how hard you can throw them.

  • What is the hardest thing about walking through a field of dead babies?

    My erection.

  • Whats worse than five dead babies in a trash can?

    One dead baby in five trash cans

  • What do you call a dead baby floating in the middle of the ocean?

    Bait.