Dentist Jokes
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How do dentists like their eggs?
Poached.
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What's the difference between a dentist and a sadist?
Newer magazines
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Whats a dentists favorite time of day?
The time of day he get into his BMW to go home from the dentists office after touching mouths all day
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What do you call a two dentists that live on opposite sides of the world?
Molar opposites.
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What's a dentists favourite time?
2:30
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What times does the chinaman go to the dentist?
Tooth-hurty
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Why would a dentist make a good airport security guard?
They both enjoy a good cavity search!
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What's the most common time to see the dentist?
Two Thirty.
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What game did the dentist play when she was a child?
Caps and robbers
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Why don't dentists display their awards?
Because they want to prevent plaque build-up.
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What did the Abominable Snowman do after he had had his teeth pulled out?
He ate the dentist.
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What did airport security tell the Dentist?
We need to give you a cavity search
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What does the dentist of the year get?
A little plaque.
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Why did the tree go to the dentist?
It needed a root canal.
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What do you get if you cross a dentist and a soldier?
A Drill Sergeant
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What did the black eyed peas say when they left the dentist?
I got a filling, woo-hoo!"
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Why do dentists only want to be awarded with paper certificates?
They hate plaque buildup.
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Why did the pharoah go to the dentist?
Because egypt his tooth.
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Why do SJWs hate dentists?
Because they want to make teeth straight and white.
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Why do only 99.9% of dentists recommend Listerine?
Because the other .1% is too busy out hunting lions
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What is the difference between a dentist and a New York baseball fan?
One yanks for the roots, the other roots for the Yanks.
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What form of humor do Dentists find most offensive?
Plaqueface
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What do you call someone who discriminates you for your oral hygiene?
A dent*ist*.
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What do you get when you visit the dentist with a dollar?
Buck-teeth!
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Who's the man who, with just the slightest touch- gives you chills and makes you tremble with anticipation ?
Your dentist.
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What is a drill team?
A group of dentists who work together.
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Why do dentists recommend jpeg?
It is a flossy compression method.
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Why did the dentist divorce the manicurist?
She tried to stick her finger in his cavity.
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Why do people dislike going to the dentist?
Because he is boring.
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What kind of award did the dentist receive?
A little plaque.
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What did one tooth say to the other?
Get your cap on the dentist is taking us out tonight.
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What's a dentists favorite time of day?
Tooth-Hurty
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Where does the dentist get his gas?
At the filling station
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Why did twoface go to the dentist?
He dented his tooth
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Why don't progressives go to the dentist?
Because dentists like everything straight and white.
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What do you call a brain surgeon that had a C- average?
A dentist
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Why would you name your human child Hunter?
Hunter is a profession. That's like naming your kid Dentist.
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What time do dentists fly airplanes?
Tooth Hurty (2:30)
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What did the dentist say to the computer?
This won't hurt a byte
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Why thank u.. are u single?
She:No, I'm a dentist
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Why did F'' (F double prime) have to go to the dentist?
It had concavities...
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What did the artist say to the dentist?
Matisse hurt!
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How many dentists does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to administer the anaesthetic one to extract the light bulb and one to offer the socket some vile pink mouthwash.
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What do you call a dentist in the army ?
A drill sergeant !
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Whats the best time to go to the dentist?
4:30pm It let's you out of work a bit early with a valid excuse
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Why did the dentist make a poor date with the manicurist?
Because they fought both tooth and nail!
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What time do you go to the dentist?
Tooth-hurty.
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What did the judge ask when he went to the dentist?
Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth
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What did the tooth say to the dentist?
Fill 'er up!"
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Why do you forget a tooth as soon as the dentist pulls it out?
Because it goes right out of your head.
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What did the dentist say to the golfer?
You have a hole in one. "
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What did the mathematician and the dentist talk about?
Calculus
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What do you get if you cross Socrates with a dentist?
A flossopher!
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Why did the TSA hire a dentist?
to help with the cavity searches
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Why can't there ever be peace in the Middle East?
We can't even get FIVE DENTISTS to agree on a toothpaste. That's why.
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Why didn't the patient sue the dentist for pulling the wrong tooth?
Because it was accidental.
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What did the judge say to the dentist?
Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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Why don't Gingers go to the dentist?
They are already aware of their corrosive gingivitis.
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Why shouldn't a dentist and manicurist be in a relationship?
All they will do is fight tooth and nail!
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Why didn't the dentist ask his secretary out?
He was already taking out a tooth
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What do Steve Harvey and a dentist have in common?
They're both experts at placing temporary crowns.
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Why did the donut go to the dentist?
To get a filling!
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What's the perfect time to go to the dentist?
Two thirty.
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What's the difference between me and a dentist?
The dentist pulls it out when it hurts.
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Why does a dentist seem moody?
Because he always looks down in the mouth.
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When is the best time to see a dentist?
Tooth-Hurty
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What did the dentist see at the North Pole?
A molar bear
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What's another name for a Dentists?
A filling station!
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What does a dentist do in his free time?
Shoot lions.
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Why did Al Gore go to the dentist for a tooth pulling?
He had an Inconvenient Tooth.
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What's worse than your doctor telling you that you have gonorrhea?
Getting the news from your dentist
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Why are you laughing?
My dentist just pulled one of my teeth out. I don't see much to laugh about in that. But it was the wrong one!
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Why do dentists like potatoes?
Because they are so filling.
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When did the Chinese man know it was time to go to the dentist?
Tooth hurty
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What does a dentist do on a roller coaster?
He braces himself
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How cool is that?
We don't know who he is, but we know his dentist!"
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Why did the mosquito go to the dentist ?
To improve his bite !
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Why did the pie go to the dentist?
It needed a filling.
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What time are you supposed to go to the dentist?
Tooth-hurty!
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Why thank you... are you single?
Girl: No, I am a dentist.
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Why did Horse Santa put his dentist on the naughty list?
You don't look a gift horse in the mouth.
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What's the best time to go to the dentist?
Tooth hurty.
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?
At tooth hurty.
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Why did Eddie Albert have to go to the dentist?
Because he had Green Acres!
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Why should everyone go to the dentist at least once every ten years?
Because of tooth decade!
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What's an Asian's favorite time to go to the dentist?
tooth-hurty
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What time does an Asian go to the dentist?
Toof Hurty.
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What's the difference between a line dance instructor and a dentist?
A. A dentist lets you sit down while he hurts you.
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Why are dentists really good hackers?
Because they always get root access.