Depend Jokes

  • What does an 80 year old lesbian taste like?

    Depends

  • What do grandparents smell like?

    Depends"

  • What's the best time of this month for vampires?

    It depends on the girl

  • Where do senior citizens often go to the restroom?

    Depends.

  • What does grandma's crotch smell like?

    Depends

  • How many Economists does it take to change a lightbulb?

    Depends on the supply and demand curve

  • What does it taste like when you go down... What does it taste like when you go down on an old lady?

    Depends...

  • How do old people go to the bathroom?

    Depends.

  • What's the difference between up and down?

    It all depends on how you look at it

  • What happens when you scare an old lady?

    Depends.

  • What does it taste like to go down on a senior citizen?

    Depends.

  • Which is easier for a man to leave: the women or the Wine?

    A: It depends on the age.

  • What is the value of Pi?

    Student: Depending on what pie. Usually is $12.99

  • Who is faster... Speedy Gonzales or Road Runner?

    It depends on how close they are to the Mexico-United States border.

  • How much does a plumber make in an hour?

    It depends on how much crack he can produce.

  • How bad are they?

    Doctor: It depends, how old are you Patient: I will be 24 soon. Doctor: Pffff, no you won't.

  • What does a 80 yr old woman taste like?

    Depends.

  • What does a 90 year old woman taste like?

    Depends.

  • How long is one minute?

    It depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on.

  • How bad is it to poop your pants?

    It Depends

  • What's the difference between babies and love?

    Love doesn't burn. What's worst part about making love to a dead baby. Digging up the coffin. How long does take to play hide and seek with a dead baby? It depends how small the pieces are.

  • Where do you usually find dogs?

    It all depends on where you lose them.

  • What do old people smell like?

    Depends

  • How many helicopters does it take for White House aides to go play a round of golf?

    A: Depends on how many were photographed.

  • Who could that be?

    It's 2:00 in the morning. Her: I don't know. Do burglars knock Me: It depends on how they were raised...

  • How many babies can fit in a blender?

    Depends how powerful the blender is

  • How high can you kick a baby?

    It depends. Are you inside or outside?

  • What does an 80-year-old person taste like?

    Depends.

  • How many Crusaders does it take to change a light bulb?

    It depends on Deus Voltage

  • How many babies does it take to shingle a roof?

    It depends on how thinly you slice them.

  • How many wizards does it take to change a lightbulb?

    Depends what you want it to change into...

  • How many black guys does it take to do the work of one white guy?

    It depends on how big his plantation is.

  • Hows your incontinence?

    Depends."

  • How many lightbulbs does it take to change a lightbulb?

    Depends on how clumsy you are.

  • What does 90 year old Pu$$y taste like?

    What does 90 year old Pu$$y taste like? Depends...

  • What do older women wear?

    Depends

  • What do you call a person who wears adult diapers?

    Ehh, it depends.

  • How do senior citizens handle indoor skydiving?

    Depends

  • What does it taste like to go down on a little old lady?

    Depends

  • How would you handle a complaint from a customer?

    Applicant: Well that depends, what's the complaint? Interviewer: He's complaining that his burger had onions on it, even though he specifically asked they were to be removed. Applicant: Well I'd start by telling him he's in the retail section.

  • How many tweekers does it take to change a light bulb?

    Depends on which method you try....

  • What language do pigs speak?

    Depends on which country they're from.

  • What's easier to get, aids or lung cancer?

    Depends what you smoke. (Not native speaker, sorry if it doesn't make sense)

  • How many people on a beach does it take to screw in a light bulb?

    depends on how many survivors there are. too soon.

  • How many angels can dance on the head of a pin?

    Depends on what tune the Devil happens to be playing. Ha. Ha ha. Ha ha ha.

  • What's an old woman taste like?

    Depends ...

  • What's the difference between Tim Howard and Jesus?

    Jesus had 11 guys he could depend on.

  • How many babies does it take to paint a house?

    Depends on how hard you throw them.

  • How much is a gram?

    Me- "Depends on what you want" Teacher- "Out, just get out"

  • What does an old lady's crotch taste like?

    Depends.

  • What do the cristae of the mitochondria and the Mexican border have in common?

    Depending what you're charged with can really effect how easily you're getting across.

  • How many philosophers does it take to change a lightbulb?

    Well it depends on what you mean by change.

  • What kind of underwear do old people wear?

    Depends.

  • What does a 80 year old women taste like?

    Depends..

  • What's the fastest way to heaven?

    It depends on the flight delays.

  • What does an old woman's qwiffy taste life?

    Depends .

  • What's the largest organ in the human body?

    A:** That depends. If you've just swallowed a Steinway and a Wurlitzer, it's probably the Steinway.

  • What do old people always keep in their back pocket?

    Depends.

  • How many contortionists fit in the trunk of a regular sedan?

    Depends on the size of the pieces.

  • How many philosophers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

    It depends on the definition of lightbulb.

  • How many calories does heartache burn?

    Me: Depends on how many calories are in the person you are setting on fire.

  • What's the difference between shame and pride?

    It depends on where I draw the line.

  • How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

    Depends on how many cops planted it there

  • What's a Grecian Urn?

    About 2 bucks an hour depending on what the current minimum wage is.

  • Who would win in a fight between John Cena and Chuck Norris?

    Depends on who wrote the script.

  • When i go down you know what it tastes like?

    Depends...