Escape Jokes

  • Why did all the prisoners at the AT&T jail escape?

    Because they had no bars on their cells!

  • What do you call a psychic midget that escapes prison?

    A small medium at large.

  • What did the headlines read after the midget fortune-teller escaped from jail?

    Small medium at large.

  • How did the haunted house escape foreclosure?

    it was repossessed

  • What did the gamer say to the fleeing prisoner?

    Run! escape!

  • What do you call an Jihadi Terrorist who just escaped prison?

    a free radical..

  • How did "El Chapo" escape prison?


  • What did the policeman say when the Arabic man escaped from jail?


  • What do you call a little person who can talk to ghosts and just escaped from prison?

    A small medium at large.

  • Why can't you escape the angry forest?

    Because there are mad trees.

  • How did the tiger escape from the zoo without being spotted?

    Tigers have stripes.

  • How is your day going?

    G- Pretty well, Do you want me to walk you back? B- walk me back? G- to the friendzone you just tried to escape.

  • Why did did the convicts escape?

    Billy Eichner has a theory... Billy Eichner says I bet those escaped convicts are going to see Ted 2.

  • What happened when Apple added the new touchbar?

    They're taking away functions, and there's no escape.

  • What has 125 teeth and prevents a savage beast from escaping?

    My zipper.

  • Why is Daniel Radcliffe celebrated and worshiped in Judaism?

    Because he's the only one who escaped the chamber.

  • What is Apple users favorite movie?

    No Escape

  • How will you escape?

    Dude: It's very simple, I will stop my imagination

  • Why did Dory warn Nemo about escaping through the toilet?

    Because it was a sewer side mission!

  • Why is turkey happy?

    It just escaped from a coop.

  • How the hell did he escaped?

    Guard : He went through the entrance.

  • How did Godzilla escape the trains?

    He threw them off their tracks.

  • What did Bea Arthur whisper in her lover's ear?

    An elaborate fantasy in which she is in prison and tries to escape by chewing through the bars of her cell.

  • What is one thing Harry Houdini can't escape from?

    Stomach punches

  • How did I escape Iraq?


  • How did the hairdresser escape?

    John Frieda.

  • What does supervillain Black Man need to do to escape the crime scene?

    Turn off all the lights.

  • How did blind slaves escape the South?

    The Underground Braille-road

  • How did the Nucleus escape from prison?

    through the cell wall.

  • What do you call a vegetable who has escaped prison?

    An escapea

  • How many men escaped the destruction of Sodom?

    A Lot.

  • Why did all the prisoners at the AT&T jail escape?

    Because they had no bars on their cells!

  • How did the hipster narco escape from prison?

    By going underground

  • How did 1337 Jesus escape his tomb?

    X-Post from ProgrammerHumor) He used an encrypted key.

  • How do you escape a fascist authoritarian regime?

    By getting aboard (a) voat

  • Why'd the crazy guy jump out of the hot air balloon's basket?

    He wanted to escape from the ballooney bin.