Field Jokes

  • Why is there no scope for dealers/middle men in the field of extractive metallurgy?

    Because he/she who smelt it, dealt it.

  • What goes 'peck bang peck bang peck bang' ?

    A bunch of chickens in a field full of balloons !

  • Why can't Mexico field a winning Olympic team?

    Because everyone that can run, jump or swim is in the US.

  • When you are driving though the field in Texas, you see a lot of cattle. They are very special. Wanna know why?

    They are out standing in the field

  • Why was the professional so impressed with the farmer?

    Why was the professional so impressed with the farmer? Because he was outstanding in his field!

  • How do you compliment a scarecrow?

    Tell him he's outstanding in his field!

  • What's another term for a prodigal farmer?

    Someone who is outstanding in his field.

  • How do you define a farmer?

    Someone that's outstanding in their field.

  • What makes the scarecrow so good at his job?

    He's outstanding in his field

  • What do you call a corn farmer who wakes up one morning to find that complex branching pathways have been cut into his field?

    amaized.

  • What is it about glow sticks that makes me want to dance in a field wearing fairy wings?

    If only I hadn't taken so many drugs I'd know this.

  • What happened to the magical tractor?

    It turned into a field

  • What is the difference between a women driving strawberries?

    None, both are collect in a field.

  • What do you call a field used to grow bows and arrows?

    An archerd.

  • Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?

    Because he was outstanding in his field

  • What's wrong with the sentence "Jack and Jill is playing in the field?

    Women should be first.

  • What do you call a farmer who's excellent at what he does?

    Outstanding in his field

  • What is the definition of a good farmer?

    A man outstanding in his field.

  • What is the definition of a farmer?

    Someone who is outstanding in his field. Credit: Laffy Taffy

  • What's the hardest part about walking through a field of dead babies?

    My erection.

  • What do you call a green cow in a field?

    Invisibull.

  • Why do good farmers only excel when they are actually farming?

    Because they are out standing in their field.

  • Why can't Mexico field a good Olympic team?

    Because everyone that can run, jump or swim is already here in the US.

  • What do you call a farmer who is really good at his job?

    A man who is outstanding in his field.

  • Why did the cow get a job at Google?

    Because she was out standing in her field.

  • What's the difference between Tom Brady and Ben Roethlisberger?

    Tom wants his balls illegally deflated on the field and Ben wants that off the field.

  • What did the cow is standing all alone in a field say?

    Where are the udders? (Thanks to my three boys for that one!)

  • Why are farmers the best at what they do?

    They are out standing in their field.

  • What is the hardest thing about walking through a field of dead babies?

    My erection.

  • What is the definition of a farmer!?

    Someone who is out-standing in his field!

  • What did the field say to the farmer with no crops?

    Stop fallowing me!

  • What is a Farmer's favorite pick-up line?

    Girl. You look so good that I wish I could plant you and grow a whole field of y'all!

  • Whats the worst joke you can play on an American?

    Two pies to the face and one somewhere in a field in Pennsylvania.

  • What do you call the field of study for dad jokes?

    ence

  • How do you catch a rabbit?

    You hide in a field and make carrot noises.

  • How many black guys does it take to cook chicken?

    None. Blacks belong in the fields, woman belong in the kitchen.

  • What do you call a really extraordinary farmer?

    A man outstanding in his field.

  • What's the worst thing about a September harvest?

    Finding a plane in your field.

  • Why did the scarecrow receive a Nobel Prize?

    He was outstanding in his field.

  • What has ears but cannot hear?

    A field of corn.

  • Why did the scare crow win the award?

    He was out standing in his field. This has Always been my favourite pun.

  • Why'd the farmer win the lifetime achievement award?

    Because he was always out standing in his field.

  • Why do Italians throw pizza onto the field after they win a match?

    Because they rain supreme.

  • How do you tell a good farmer?

    He's outstanding in his field

  • Why did the scare crow get a raise?

    Because he was outstanding in his field. Annnnd you all have cancer now.

  • What do you call a person who is outstanding in their field?

    A farmer

  • What do you call an empty field?

    The french army at the beginning of a war!

  • Why can't the Philippines field an ice hockey team?

    The players all drowned in spring training.

  • How can you tell baseball players are smarter than football players?

    When was the last time you saw a baseball team penalized for too many men on the field?

  • Why was the corn farmer paranoid?

    Because the field has ears.

  • Whats the problem with running through a field of dead babies?

    Your erection....

  • How did the Muslim find the goat in the field?

    Very Satisfying.

  • What did the field say to the farmer?

    Plow Me!

  • Why was Farmer Bob so good at his job?

    Because he was outstanding in his field

  • Why did the cows keep returning to the field of marijuana?

    It was the pot calling the cattle back.

  • Why do geologists love sandwiches in the field?

    Because they can get their whole grains.

  • Why are cows so famous?

    Because they're out-standing in their field.

  • Why did the farmer run through his fields with a steamroller?

    Because he wanted mashed potatoes!!!!

  • How can you tell if a farmer is a good farmer?

    He's out standing in his field

  • Why did the cow win a Nobel Prize?

    Because he was out standing in his field.

  • What do you call a monkey in a mine field?

    A babooooom!

  • How did the scarecrow win a noble prize?

    He was *out standing* in his field.

  • Why The Scarecrow Won The Nobel Prize?

    Because he was outstanding in his field!!

  • Why did the scarecrow win an award?

    Because he was outstanding in his field.

  • How did the sheep get a Nobel Prize?

    It was out standing in its field!