Light Bulb Jokes
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How many 'Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None: A 'Real Woman' would have plenty of Real Men around to do it.
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How many students does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to hold the light bulb and one to drink until the room spins.
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How many Australians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
It doesn't matter, they all turn them the the wrong way.
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How many servers does it take to change a light bulb?
I don't know, it's not my side work.
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How many suh boys does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, its already lit fam. I cannot take credit for this due to being told this joke by a freind. He was in fact lit af.
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How many drummers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Three. 1 to screw it in and 2 to talk about how much better Neil Peart could've done it
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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb?
To get to the other side!
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How many Scotsmen does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Scotsmen don't change light bulbs it's cheaper to sit in the dark
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How many Buddhists does it take to screw a light bulb?
None. They believe that the enlightenment comes from within.
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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Need to know ASAP.
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How many dads does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to put it in and one to complain that he never screws anything anymore.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
I've got this neat candle holder...
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How many blonde's does it take to change a light bulb?
A. 3. 1 to find the bulb 1 to find a ladder and 1 to find a man.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?
None. The piano player can do that with his left hand.
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How many NBA refs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, they only screw playoff games.
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How many Oregonians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Six. One to screw in the lightbulb and five to fend off all those Californians trying to share the experience.
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. The light bulb you remove and the light bulb you replace it with.
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How many Millennials does it take to change a light bulb?
None! We don't change light bulbs. We disrupt them.
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How many Dell Service Reps does it take to change a light bulb?
I don't know, I am on hold.
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How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
Three, one to climb the ladder, one to shake it, and one to sue the ladder company.
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How many philosophers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
It depends on the definition of lightbulb.
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How many Dragon Ball Z characters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just one. But it takes 20 episodes
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How many Tumblr women does it take to change a light bulb?
I WILL NOT BE A VICTIM!
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How many introverts does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Why does it have to be a group activity
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How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a light bulb?
WANNA RIDE BIKES
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How many men does it take to change a light bulb?
Not all of them.
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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just Juan.
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How many blondes does it take to... How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb?
5... 1 to hold the bulb and 4 to spin the chair
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How many evolutionists does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one but it takes eight million years.
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How many redditors commenting on a given post does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Not possible. Their hands are too slippery with each other's ejaculate.
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How many North Koreans does it take to change a light bulb?
One, only **Glorious Leader** gets access to light bulbs
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How many ADD/ADHD kids does it take to change a light bulb?
Wanna go ride bikes
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How many ladybugs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two, but don't ask me how they got in there.
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How many hobos does it take to screw in a light bulb?
They don't screw in light bulbs, they screw in dumpsters
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How many Libertarian Capitalists does it take to change a light bulb?
I ain't buyin those fancy Big-Government ones. The free market idn't ready.
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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb?
They don't change it, they just take forever to find where to fit the batteries
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How many Mexicans does it take to fix a light bulb?
Twenty-Juan
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How many pot heads does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just one, we're stoned not stupid.
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How many architects does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one but he has to coordinate ten other professionals who are doing this quiet complicated task.
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How many Jon Snows does it take to change a light bulb?
It wouldn't matter. Jon Snow knows nothing.
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What did Russians use for light before candles?
Light bulbs
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How many blacks does it take to change a light bulb?
5/3. The same amount as for whites.
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How many feminists does it take to change a light-bulb?
THAT'S NOT FUNNY!
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How many journalists does it take to change a light bulb?
We just report the facts we don't change them."
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How many A.D.D. kids does it take to change a light bulb?
Look a squirrel!
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How many Screenwriters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: The bulbs IN and it's staying IN!
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How many Camera Assistants does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Five: One to do it and four to tell you how they did it on the last job.
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How many MRAs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Tires need changing too you know!
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: What's a light bulb
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How many frames per second does it take to screw in a light bulb?
30 because that's peasants work.
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How many telemarkers does it take to change a light bulb?
3. One to change the bulb and two to talk about how beautiful the turns were.
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How many native Americans does it take to change a light bulb?
About seven. One to change the bulb, six to sing the song.
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How many Crusaders does it take to change a light bulb?
It depends on Deus Voltage
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How many controlled oposition does it take to change a light bulb?
None you know of. Since they signed a Non Disclosure Agreement to not talk about it.
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How many hippies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Hippies don't screw in light bulbs, they screw in tents.
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How many Accountants does it take to change a light bulb?
What sort of answer did you have in mind None-just assume it's changed.
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How many jugglers does it take to change a light bulb?
One, but it takes at least three light bulbs.
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How many people from the future does it take to change a light bulb?
The lightbulb works fine...
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How many Ayatollahs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None-there weren't any light bulbs in the 13th century.
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one provided there's a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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How many hillbillies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
2. A man, his wife, and his cousin
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What did the light bulb say to the switch?
You turn me on."
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How many blind people does it take to screw in a light bulb?
I am not sure, I haven't seen them try and I can't do it either.
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How Many A Cappella Singers Does It Take To Change A Light Bulb?
Twelve. Three to Physically Change the Bulb, Three to Talk About How Complicated it Was and Six to Call themselves Electricians.
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How many white girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Pshh....white girls don't know how to screw.
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How many atheists does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to actually change the bulb, and the other to videotape so Christians can't claim God did it.
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How man nihilists does it take to change a light bulb?
It doesn't matter.
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How many Romans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
V.
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How many Asian-American actors does it take to change a light bulb?
None - because they would all be replaced by white actors.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Twenty. 1 to hold the bulb 2 to turn the ladder and 17 to be on the guest list.
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How many white people does it take to replace a light bulb?
One to hold the bulb, and the rest to screw the whole world.
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How many Hipster's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Oh, just some number you've probably never heard of.
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How many blondes does it take to screw a light bulb??
Just 1...blondes will screw anything.
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How many bassoonists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Only one but they'll insist on going through about 5 bulbs before they find one that suits this particular room and situation.
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What's the difference between a pregnant lady and a light bulb?
You can unscrew the light bulb. - Steve Martin, "My Blue Heaven"
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How many Hipsters does it take to change a light bulb?
it's this really obscure number. You've probably never even heard of it. No big deal.
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How many professional soccer players does it take to change a light bulb?
Six. One to change the bulb, and five to hug and kiss him.
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How many girls does it take to change a light bulb?
I don't know, you tell me.
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Why can't blondes put in light bulbs?
A: They keep breaking them with the hammers.
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How many college guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, they prefer Natural Light
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How many Alzheimer victims does it take to change a light bulb?
To get to the other side
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How many Apple executives does it take to change a light bulb?
They dont. They turn it into the hype of the new generation.
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How many pandas does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Technically, just two, but it is really hard to get them to breed in captivity.
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How many Mexicans does it take to replace a light bulb?
Juan
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How many friendzoned guys does it take to change a light bulb?
None, they'll just keep complimenting it and get mad when it doesn't want to screw.
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How Many Dragonball Z Characters Does it Take to Screw in a Light-bulb?
just one, but it will take 4 episodes.
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How many lead guitarists does it take to change a light bulb?
100; 1 to do it, and 99 to say "I could do that."
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How many LA cops does it take to change light bulb?
Six. One to do it and five to smash the old bulb to splinters.
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How many boxers does it take to change a light bulb?
One. They're used to having their lights knocked out.That joke turned dark fast. I'll see myself to my respective corner.
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How many Pokmon does it take to change a light bulb?
Not sure, gotta catch them all first!
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How many reddit admins does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Seriously who knows? It's pitch black in here.
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How many kids with ADD does it take to change a light bulb?
Wanna go ride bikes? My all time favorite joke. Sorry if it has already been posted but who has the time to browse all of .
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How many software engineers does it take to change a light bulb?
Can't be done, it's a hardware problem.
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How many tweekers does it take to change a light bulb?
Depends on which method you try....
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How many mosquitoes does it take to screw in a light bulb?
2...and don't ask me how they got in there. (My 87 year old grandma just told me this one)
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How many boxers does it take to change a light bulb?
One. They're used to having their lights knocked out.That joke turned dark fast. I'll see myself to my respective corner.
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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One because his knee grows.
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How many bricks do you need to screw in a lightbulb?
Just two, but you're going to need a lot of patience and light bulbs.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Well first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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How many black people are needed to change a light bulb?
One less now, because the one who tried to steal the light bulb was shot by the cops.
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How many sound guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two, two... One, two.
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How many Alzheimer victims does it take to change a light bulb?
To get to the other side
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How many ADD's does it take to change a light bulb?
Let's go fishing
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How many psychiatrists does it... ...take to change a light bulb?
0, the light bulb has to want to change itself.
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How many Environmentalists does it take to change a light bulb?
It doesn't matter, they will never change a thing.
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How many Americans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, that's a Mexican's job.
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How many guys wearing turbans does it take to change a light bulb?
Sikhs.
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How many PA's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Nine........one to do it and eight others to wish they'd been asked.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?
It takes two. One to change the bulb and the other to kick the switch.
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How many Missouri Police officers does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They just shoot the room for being black.
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How many dentists does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to administer the anaesthetic one to extract the light bulb and one to offer the socket some vile pink mouthwash.
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How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but the light bulb really has to want to change.
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How many anti-feminists does it take to screw the light bulb?
Anti feminists Nah, they can't screw
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb they screw in a hot tub.
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How many baby sitters does it take to change a light bulb?
None They don't make Pampers small enough.
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How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Light bulb.
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How many Bill Gateses does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One. He puts the bulb in and lets the world revolve around him.
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How many dragon ball characters does it take to change a light bulb ?
Only one... but it will take a few episodes. The lightbulb saga
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How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one. But it takes about 8-10 visits.
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How many bees does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two, but how do they get in there
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How many babies does it take to change a light bulb?
None. Babies don't have the motor skills or the depth perception to change a light bulb.
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How many light bulbs did it take to screw a human?
None, there not too bright with doing anything except showing us where to go when were lost in the dark
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How many A.D.D. kids does it take to change a light bulb?
Look a squirrel!
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How many girlfriends does it take to change a light bulb?
It has to change for itself.
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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb?
They don't change it, they just take forever to find where to fit the batteries
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How many Americans does it take to change a light bulb?
None. According to Trump, they outsourced it to India & China.
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How does an engineer screw a light-bulb?
He holds the light-bulb over the socket and waits for the world to revolve around him.
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How many reddit offices does it take to screw you in a light bulb?
yishan
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How many biologists does it take to change a light bulb?
Four. One to change it and three to write the environmental-impact statement.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: It's not a bulb it's a globe.
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How many archaeologists does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to change it while the other two argue about how old the old one is.
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
They don't need to, they glow in the dark...
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How many?
How many pessimists does it take to change a light bulb? None - it's probably screwed it too tight anyhow!
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How many pixies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two, but don't ask me how they got in there.
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How many Sanders supporters does it take to change a light bulb?
Trick question, they can't change anything.
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How many divorced men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Nobody knows, the never get to keep the house.
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How many metal heads does it take to change a light bulb?
None. Darkness foreverrrr!
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How many librarians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
I don't know but I can look it up for you."
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How many IT people does it take to change a light bulb?
Do you have a ticket for that?
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One. They hold it in place and wait for the world to revolve around them.
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How many pilots does it take to change a light bulb?
None it is done by the automatic pilot.
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How many zen buddists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One and not one.
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How many Americans does it take to change a light bulb?
Just kidding, you can't change anything in the United States.
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How many Super Sayajins does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one, but it lasts five episodes. And Kuririn dies.
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How many Irishmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?
5. 1 to screw in the light bulb, and 4 to remark on how grand the old one was.
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How many depressed people does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Who cares...
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What's the difference between a light bulb and a pregnant woman?
You can unscrew a light bulb!
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How many newsmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Only one but he'll tell everybody.
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How many South American people does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A Brazilian
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How many mods does it take to screw in a light bulb?
removed
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Why did the hipster burn his fingers?
because he changed the light bulb before it was cool
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How many Vladimir Putins' does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, they didn't Putin enough effort. Just a play on his last name, nothing more.
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How many X does it take to change a light bulb?
N! One to change the light bulb, and n-1 to display stereotypical behavioral traits of X!
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How many Asian-American actors does it take to change a light bulb?
None - because they would all be replaced by white actors.
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How does an SJW screw in a light-bulb?
Zir holds it up to the socket and waits for the world to revolve around zirself.
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How many divorced men does it take to change a light bulb?
No one knows they never keep the house!
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How many black men does it take to screw in a light-bulb?
Just 1 because we are all equal and race has no impact.
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How many Bill Cosbys does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one but every time he does he causes a blackout.
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How many cafeteria staff does it take to change a light bulb?
Sorry we closed 18 seconds ago and I've just cashed up."
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How many IT guys does it take to change a light bulb?
No IT guys change light bulbs, they just keep flicking the switch on and off again until something happens.
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How many Meth-Heads does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Three, One to hold the lightbulb and Two to smoke till the room spins!
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How many "All Lives Matter" protesters does it take to change a light bulb?
None, because they keep on asking why all of the other light bulbs in the house aren't being changed at the same time.
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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a light bulb?
to get to the other side
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How many vegans does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to get up on his high horse and another to chastise the first about oppressing horses.
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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?
Two - One to put it most of the way in, and one to give it an interesting twist at the end.
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How many r/jokes commenters does it take to change a light bulb?
I don't know but that reminds me of a similar joke my uncle used to tell...
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How many Jihadists does it take to change a light bulb?
Allah them. (I googled several varations and thus far I believe I am the originator)
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How many amateur masochists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Only one; But it takes a WHOLE E.R. room to extract it afterwards. Double joke! "whole... hole." it's a play on words ;)
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How many alternative school kids does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just one, but they get extra credits for it
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How Many Muslim Women Does it Take to Screw In a Light Bulb?
Silly, Muslim Women aren't allowed to screw in light bulbs.
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How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to hold the light bulb and two to spin the ladder."
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How many optometrists does it take to change a light bulb?
One..... Or two...
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How many auditors does it take to change a light bulb?
How many did it take last year
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How long does it take a necrophiliac to screw in a light bulb?
Not long... they like to do it while it's still warm.
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a person?
None. Light bulbs don't change anything.
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How many punks does it take to change a light bulb?
None. Punks never changed anything.
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How many ska kids does it take to change a light bulb?
Three; one to drop the bulb and two to yell "pick it up pick it up!"
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How many teenage mutant ninja turtules does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Five. It's a huge problem.
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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One, but the light bulb has to *want* to be screwed in.
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How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to hold the bulb, and one to drink until the room starts spinning.
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How many Harvard graduates does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one. He holds up the light bulb, and the world revolves around him
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How many teenagers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
It takes 1 to screw it in, and 99 to tweet about it.
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How many waiters does it take to change a light bulb?
None a burned out bulb can't catch a waiter's eye.
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How many Socialists does it take to change a light bulb?
None comrade, the bulb holds the seeds to its own revolution!
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How many Marxists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None: The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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How many Vietnam Vets does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: YOU DON'T KNOW, MAN, YOU WEREN'T THERE!!! YOU DON'T KNOW!!!
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How many cashiers does it take to change a light bulb?
Are you kidding They won't even change a five dollar bill."
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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb?
Seriously, I gotta figure out how many slaves I need to buy
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How many Apple executives does it take to change a light bulb?
They dont. They turn it into the hype of the new generation.
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How many babysitters does it take to change a light bulb?
Are you joking? They can't even change a dirty diaper!
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How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but the light bulb should be willing to change.
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How many perverts does it take to put in a light bulb?
Only one, but... It takes the entire ER department to get it back out.
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How many forever alone guys does it take to change a light bulb?
One, but he wishes it was two.
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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb?
You can't tell it's in the dark
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How many WoW devs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Doesn't matter. They'll just nerf darkness next patch instead.
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How many redditors does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to screw it in and one to take credit for it.
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How many optimists does it take to change a light bulb?
Who says it's dark
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Uh...standby I'll check on that.
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How many software developers does it take to fix a light bulb?
none, its a hardware issue.
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What's the difference between a light bulb and my pregnant girlfriend?
I can unscrew a lightbulb.
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How many Democrats does it take to destroy a light bulb?
A: None. They only know how to destroy the taxpayers.
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How many Orthodox Rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Change?
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How many children with ADHD does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Wanna go swimming?
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How many Southern Baptists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Change !
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How many Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Don't know, the pope hasn't said yet. How many Lutherans does it take to screw in a light bulb None, Lutherans don't change.
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How many dwarfs does take to change a light bulb?
It can vary, but It's quite hilarious to watch.
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How many homeless people does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Zero. Homeless people don't screw in light bulbs they screw in cardboard boxes.
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How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb?
One. They're efficient and don't have humour.
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How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
It's an obscure number, you have probably never heard of it.
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How many Global Warming nutjobs does it take to change a light bulb?
None, they don't use light bulbs. They live in caves and use no forms of artificial energy because they wouldn't want to be perceived as hypocrites or morons.
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How many atheists does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to actually change the bulb, and the other to videotape so Christians can't claim God did it.
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How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Let's go ride our bikes.
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How many fugitives does it take to fix a light bulb?
1/3
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How many conspiratards does it take to screw in a light bulb....?
NONE! ITS A SECRET GOVERNMENT PLOT TO KEEP US IN THE DARK!"
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How many Sigmund Freud's does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Cocaine.
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How many Spanish people does it take to change a light bulb?
Just Juan.
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How many libertarians?
How many libertarians does it take to screw in a light-bulb? None. The market will take care of it.
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How many biologists does it take to change a light bulb?
Four. One to change it and three to write the environmental-impact statement.
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How many house flies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just the standard two, but I'll be damned if I know how they got in there.
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How many Soviets does it take to change a light bulb?
None! In Soviet Russia, light bulb changes you!
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How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to hold the bulb, and one to drink until the room starts spinning.
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How many atheist does it take to change a light bulb?
None. It will happen itself.
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How many Ricks from TWD does it take to change a light bulb?
Carl gets shot in the face.
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How many minimalists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
1
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How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?
There's really no sure way to know.
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How many feminists?
How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb Trick question, they can't change anything.
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How many twists does a feminist need to screw in a light bulb?
None. They just grab it and the world to revolve around them.
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How many Borg does it take to change a light bulb?
All of them.
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How many pollsters does it take to change a light bulb?
One, plus or minus one.
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How many unemployed actors does it take to change a light bulb?
fixed) 100. 1 to change it and 99 to stand around and complain about how they coulda done a better job.
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How many white people does it take to screw in a light bulb?
All of them. One to hold the bulb and the rest to screw the world.
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How many graduate students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Only one but it may take him/her more than five years to do it.
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How do you change the light bulb in the dark?
You don't. The police shoot you.
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How many narcissists does it take to change a light bulb?
One. They just hold the bulb in place and the world revolves around them.
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How many baby sitters does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None They don't make Pampers small enough.
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How many Chinese people does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one but he has to manufacture it first.
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How many black metalheads does it take to change a light bulb?
100. 1 to change the light bulb and the other 99 to complain about how the old light bulb was much better.
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How many defensive coordinators does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Zero. You can't fit a hairless ten-year-old inside a light bulb.
-
How many bros does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They prefer Natural Light.
-
How many feminist does it take to change a light bulb?
None because feminist can't change anything.
-
How many Emos does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They prefer to cry in the dark.
-
How many indie bands does it take to change a light bulb?
Eh, it's some number you've probably never heard of.
-
How many NRA members does it take to change a light bulb?
A: More guns.
-
How many schoolteachers does it take to change a light bulb?
None. Anything not completed during the lesson is added to the homework.
-
How many dead whores does it take to change a light bulb?
More than three, I still can't reach it.
-
How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: WHAT
-
How many engineers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One to screw in the bulb and another to talk about how complicated it was.
-
How many Vietnam vets does it take the screw in a light bulb?
THAT'S RIGHT!!! YOU DON'T KNOW BECAUSE YOU WEREN'T THERE!!!
-
How many recovering alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb?
We'll get on it next week
-
How many applicants does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one but 200 applied for the job.
-
How many boring guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One
-
How many Vietnam veterans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
YOU WOULDN'T KNOW SON YOU WEREN'T THERE!!
-
How many "suh dudes" does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. It's already lit fam.
-
How many idiots who ask stupid questions does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Change it to what
-
How many population geneticists does it take to change a light bulb?
It's independent of population size.
-
Why does it take 10 women with premenstrual tension to change a light bulb?
IT JUST DOES, OK JERK !!!! NOW SHUT UP OR I WILL STAB YOU WITH THE SCISSORS!
-
How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?
10. 1 to change it and 9 to say they could have done it better.
-
How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?
Third as many as for a regular bulb.
-
How many 1st AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Why are you asking me that question Can't you see I'm busy!
-
How many tax advisors does it take to change a light bulb?
In the summer there is a tax deductible convention in Hawaii dealing exactly with this issue."
-
How many dancers does it take to change a light bulb?
Five six seven eight!
-
How many Apple employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A lot, apparently. Have you seen their new building?
-
How many Poles does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Just one but you need 6000 Russian troops in case he goes on strike!
-
How many chicken does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Still counting. Those darned birds can't seem to cross the road to get over here to screw in the light bulb.
-
How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Three. One to hold the light bulb do and two to spin the chair
-
How many Germans does to take to screw in a light bulbs?
NEIN, NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN
-
How many super saiyans does it take to change a light bulb?
Find out next time, on Dragon Ball Z!
-
How many psychologist does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just one, but the light bulb is going to need to change itself.
-
How many Black Lives Matters protesters does it take to change a light bulb?
Don't be silly, Black Lives Matters protesters can't change anything.
-
How many conspiracy theorists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
We may never know the truth.
-
How many British navy Officers does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one but it takes him seven weeks to get there.
-
How many out of date redditers does it take to change a light bulb?
OVER 9000
-
How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?
Ten: one to screw it in and nine to say, "Pssh, I can do that."
-
How many auditors does it take to change a light bulb?
How many did it take last year
-
How many redditors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Only one, but an extra 15 to repost.
-
How many Buddhists does it take to change a light bulb?
None, the changes necessary will come from within.
-
How many social scientists does it take to change a light bulb?
None. Social scientists do not change light bulbs they search for the root cause as to why the last one went out.
-
How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Actually agents will screw in just about anything.
-
How many political idealists does it take to change a light bulb?
None, political idealists can't change anything.
-
How many nuts does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A Brazilian
-
How many Biebers does it take to change a light bulb?
None. There are no light bulbs in the closet. Another one: Why is Justin Bieber so pale Because there's no light inside the closet
-
How many retards does it take to change a light bulb?
Well, line up so that I can find out..
-
How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb?
They don't bother, you can find lutfisk in the dark.
-
How many choir directors does it take to change a light bulb?
No one knows. No one ever watches the choir director.
-
How many koalas does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Technically just one, as long as he's koalafied.
-
How many Freudian psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to hold the ladder and one to screw your mother - I mean light bulb!
-
How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb?
To get to the other side.
-
Whores does it take to change a light bulb?
If this gets 500 upvotes i'll tell you!
-
How many monkeys does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. Monkeys screw in trees.
-
How many religious people does it take to change a light bulb?
This is a joke I came up with. Q: How many religious people does it take to change a light bulb? A: There's no need to change it when you can easily convince everyone that it still works, but they've gone blind.
-
How many architects does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one but he has to coordinate ten other professionals who are doing this quiet complicated task.
-
How many applicants does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one but 200 applied for the job.
-
How many dirty buggers does it take to change a light bulb?
Thirty.
-
How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Just one more guys I promise.
-
How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two! But don't ask me how they got inside there.
-
How many Serbs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two-one to shoot the old bulb out and one to screw the new one in.
-
What profession does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Driver
-
How many egocentrics does it take to change a light-bulb?
Me, and only me!
-
How many Republicans does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to pay a Mexican to do it, two to deport him afterwards.
-
How many Vietnam vets does it take to change a light bulb?
You don't know cause you weren't there
-
How many Harvard students does it take to change a light bulb?
One. He holds it up and the world revolves around him.
-
How Many A Cappella Singers Does It Take To Change A Light Bulb?
Twelve. Three to Physically Change the Bulb, Three to Talk About How Complicated it Was and Six to Call themselves Electricians.
-
How many Asians does it take to change a light bulb?
2. 1 to change the light bulb, the other to take pictures.
-
How many amateur masochists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Only one; But it takes a WHOLE E.R. room to extract it afterwards. Double joke! "whole... hole." it's a play on words ;)
-
How many Russian leaders does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Nobody knows. Russian leaders don't last as long as light bulbs. A: None the old bulb is just suffering from a cold.
-
How many Jersey girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One. They'll screw anything
-
How many 'Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?
None: A 'Real Woman' would have plenty of Real Men around to do it.
-
How many fishermen does it take to change a light bulb?
One but you should have seen the bulb it must have been THIS big.
-
How many existentialists does it take to change a light-bulb?
Two, one to change the light-bulb, and one to observe how it symbolizes an incandescent beacon of subjectivity in a netherworld of cosmic nothingness. This is courtesy of Spencer Reid.(CM)
-
How many dancers does it take to change a Light bulb ?
5,6,7,8.
-
How many cafeteria staff does it take to change a light bulb?
Sorry we closed 18 seconds ago and I've just cashed up."
-
How many Borg does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Irrelevant, you will be assimilated!
-
How many bitter Hillary Clinton supporters does it take to change a light bulb?
None, we've decided to let a man do the job.
-
How many Survivors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One to start screwing it in and the rest to vote 'em off the ladder.
-
How many Anime characters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Only 1, but it takes them 15 episodes to do it.
-
How many Canadians does it take to change a light bulb?
Just two. One to politely ask and the other to politely help.
-
How many reddit users did it take to screw on a light bulb?
They could not do it, they are all autistic.
-
How many McDonald's counter girls does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to change it and one to put some chips with it.
-
How many people does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just two. It only requires that either the people are very small or the light bulb is very large.
-
How many blind people does it take to change a light bulb?
None if nobody's looking.
-
How many Anti-Vaxxers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
As a mother, I choose not to screw it in. Light bulbs are dangerous weapons created by the Soviet Union, and I will not screw it in; it could severely hurt my child. As everyone knows, light bulbs are the principle source of autism in this world, and I have to take a stand on it.
-
How many blonde's does it take to screw In a light bulb?
3: One holds the light bulb, and the other two spin the Chair.
-
How many Republicans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, they're all screwed.
-
How many dead memes does it take to change a light bulb?
Over 9000.
-
How many Super Sayains does it take to change a light bulb?
Find out next time on Dragon Ball Z!
-
How many bricks do you need to screw in a lightbulb?
Just two, but you're going to need a lot of patience and light bulbs.
-
How many graphic designers does it take to change a light bulb?
Does it have to be a light bulb? 'Cause I had this other idea...
-
How many Hispanics does it take to change a light bulb..?
Just Juan.
-
How many 1st AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Why are you asking me that question Can't you see I'm busy!
-
How many alternative school kids does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just one, but they get extra credits for it
-
How many South Americans does it take to change a light bulb?
A Brazilian.
-
How many Mexicans does it take to change a light bulb?
Juan
-
Why is it easy for light bulbs to travel?
Because they pack light.
-
How many spoiled rich girls does it take... ...to change a light bulb?
Just one, she yells, "DAAAAADDY, I need a new house!"
-
How manny women dose it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just one she hokds the blub and the world revolves around her.
-
How many perverts does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just one. But it takes the whole ER to get it out.
-
How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Five. One to handle the bulb and 4 to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
-
How many optometrists does it take to change a light bulb?
1 or 2? 1... or 2?
-
How many Chinese Red Guards does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: 10000 - to give the bulb a cultural revolution.
-
How many Steam employees does it take to change a light bulb?
Honestly Im not sure, they havent got back to me yet. It's been 3 weeks.
-
How many people at a Music Festival does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Zero, its already lit
-
How many Northern Californians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Hella
-
How many Russians does it take to change a light bulb?
None. In Russia, light bulb changes you.
-
How many hippies does it take to change a light bulb?
Hippies can't change anything. And they smell bad.
-
How many narcissists does it take to screw in a light-bulb?
One. He stands in place while the whole world revolves around him.
-
How many vampires does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, they prefer the dark.
-
How many sith lords does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They like it on the dark side.
-
How many cancer patients does it take to change a light bulb?
1 and 12 people to say how inspiring it was
-
How many Honor Guards does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: 22 one to screw it in 21 to shoot the bulb.
-
How many bad joke tellers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One.
-
How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?
There's really no sure way to know.
-
How many Borg does it take to change a light bulb?
All of them.
-
How many racists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. Racists dont like to be enlightened.
-
How many narwhals does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Bacon
-
How Many Business Analysts Does It Take To Change A Light Bulb?
None. The light bulb shall never burn out. (OK. It's more cathartic than funny...)
-
How does a conceptual artist change a light bulb?
He calls it a work of art.
-
How many country stars does it take to change a light bulb?
Six-1 to change the bulb and 5 to sing about how much they miss the old one.
-
Why does it take *two* premenstrual women to change a light bulb?
BECAUSE!!
-
How many doctors does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one but he has to have a nurse to tell him which end to screw in.
-
How many shrinks does it take to change a lightbulb?
Just one, but the light bulb really has to want to change.
-
How many white people does it take to change a light bulb?
A brunch.
-
How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a light bulb?
WANNA RIDE BIKES
-
What's your favorite racial (but not racist) joke?
How many South Americans does it take to screw in a light bulb? A Brazilian!
-
How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: 100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
-
How many blacks does it take to change a light bulb?
5/3. The same amount as for whites.
-
How many paranoids does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Who wants to know? .... saw this joke in today's
-
Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a light bulb?
Because, they're so darn stupid!
-
How many British navy Officers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Only one but it takes him seven weeks to get there.
-
How many "All Lives Matter" protesters does it take to change a light bulb?
None, because they keep on asking why all of the other light bulbs in the house aren't being changed at the same time.
-
How many couples does it take to screw in a light bulb?
They can't, it'd be much too cramped. How would they even get in there in the first place?
-
How many trolls does it take to change a light bulb?
deleted
-
How many blondes does it take to screw a light bulb??
Just 1...blondes will screw anything.
-
How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb ?
A: 50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .
-
How many Iranians does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One hundred - One to screw it in and 99 to hold the house hostage.
-
How many Duggar does it take to screw in a light bulb?
They screw children, not light bulbs.
-
How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One. No two. No... How many do we have on the truck
-
How many firemen does it take to change a light bulb?
Four - three to cut a hole in the roof and one to change the bulb.
-
How many theoretical physicists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two, one to hold the bulb and one to rotate the universe.
-
How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Fish
-
How many Sayians does it take to change a light bulb?
One. But it'll take 3 episodes, and Krillin dies.
-
How many blind people does it take to screw in a light bulb?
I am not sure, I haven't seen them try and I can't do it either.
-
How many blondes does it take to screw a light bulb?
Just 1...blondes will screw anything.
-
How many bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One to screw it in and one to complain that it's electrified.
-
How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: "Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
-
How many Ferguson protesters does it take to change a light bulb?
None they can't change anything.
-
How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Who gives a cluck (I wonder if the moderators will censor this joke merely on the grounds that it is categorically terrible )
-
How many protesters does it take to change a light bulb?
Trick question. Protesters never change anything.
-
How many people does it take to change a light bulb in Brazil?
A Brazillion!!!
-
How many trannies does it take to change a light bulb?
None, it's perfectly happy being broken, it's the fitting that has to change.
-
How many Super Saiyans does it take to change a light-bulb?
It's not >9000) FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON DRAGGGGON BAAAAL ZEEEEEEEEE
-
How many ska kids does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One to drop it and six to pick it up pick it up pick it up
-
How many survivors of nuclear war does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. People that glow in the dark don't need lights.
-
How many PETA memebers does it take to change a light bulb?
None. PETA can't change anything.
-
How many immature people does it take to screw in a light bulb?
69
-
How many Hillary supporters does it take to change a light bulb?
None. cmon , they'd much rather be kept in the dark.
-
How many Mennonites does it take to change a light bulb?
Seven - one to actually change the bulb and six to complain that they liked the old one better.
-
How many Australians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
It doesn't matter, they all turn them the the wrong way.
-
How many Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Don't know, the pope hasn't said yet. How many Lutherans does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, Lutherans don't change.
-
How many triage nurses does it take to change a light bulb?
One but the bulb will have to spend four hours in the waiting room.
-
How many judges does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one he holds it still and the whole world revolves around him. Just one but two lawyers have to explain him how to do it.
-
How many atheist does it take to change a light bulb?
None. It will happen itself.
-
How many Saiyans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just one... But it takes 4 episodes and Krillin dies...
-
How many film directors does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one but he wants to do it thirty-two times and when he's done everyone says that his last light bulb was much better.
-
How many women with PMS does it take to screw-in a light bulb?
Two. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . IT JUST DOES, OKAY?
-
How many Ferguson police does it take to change a light bulb?
None, they'll just shoot the room for being black.
-
How many Viet Nam vets does it take to change a light bulb?
You don't know? That's right, you know, because you weren't there, man!
-
How many scientists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Answer: I don't know, I'm no scientist
-
How many Will Ferrell's does it take to change a light bulb?
One, AND IT'S NOT FUNNY!
-
How many frat guys does it take to change a light bulb?
Four. One to change the bulb and three to make a t-shirt about it.
-
How many lazy people does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Count for yourself...
-
How many Irish folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to change the bulb and one to sing about how grand the old bulb was.
-
How many OU (University of Oklahoma) coaches does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They aren't about to change a bulb when flipping a switch has worked for 15 years.
-
How many RothChilds does it take to change a light bulb?
There still working on it...
-
How many blind men would it take to change a light bulb?
Why would a blind man need a light bulb?
-
How many ADD/ADHD kids does it take to change a light bulb?
Wanna go ride bikes?
-
How many politicians does it take to change a light bulb?
Two: One to change it, and the other one to change it back again.
-
How many cashiers does it take to change a light bulb?
Are you kidding They won't even change a five dollar bill."
-
How many Swiss does it take to change a light bulb?
None. We pay a German to do it.
-
How many Bill Gateses does it take to change a light bulb?
One. He puts the bulb in and lets the world revolve around him.
-
How many PETA members does it take to change light bulb?
none, PETA can't change anything.
-
How many Studio Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: We don't know. Light bulbs last longer than studio executives.
-
How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?
Salmon
-
How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?
One
-
How many Dragon Ball characters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just 1, but It'll take 7 episodes for him to do it.
-
How many Mexicans are needed to change a light bulb?
Juan.
-
How many line dance instructors does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Five!...Six!...Seven!...Eight!
-
How many /r/Jokes mods does it take to change a light bulb?
removed
-
How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?
Seven. One to install the bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years
-
How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Depends on how many cops planted it there
-
How many Apple employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A lot, apparently. Have you seen their new building?
-
How many /r/jokes reditorz does it take to change a light bulb?
21, the first 20 will just repost an old one.
-
How many feminists does it take...... ...to change a light bulb?
0, woman are so unrepresented in technology that this is not possible.
-
How many buddhists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Three - one to change it, one to not-change it and one to both change-and not-change it.
-
How many bros does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They prefer Natural Light.
-
How many Libertarians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Does it even matter? We're all screwed anyway, man."
-
How many Irish guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?
30 - One to hold the light bulb and 29 to drink until the room spins.
-
How many non-sequiturs does it take to change a light bulb?
Yes
-
How many sorority girls does it take to change a light bulb?
Six. One to change it, one to take pictures and four to make t-shirts for the event.
-
How many cops do you need to change a light bulb?
None. They just shoot the room for being black. Credit: donator on some stream said the joke and just wanted to share it.
-
How many people with OCD does it take to change a light bulb?
Seven. It *has* to be seven.
-
How many millenials does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just one. They hold it in place while the world revolves around them.
-
How many communists does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One guy to screw in the light bulb, and the other guy to shoot him if he doesn't do it right.
-
How many Communists does is take to screw in a light bulb?
All of them.
-
How many bees does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two, but how do they get in there?
-
How many Asians does it take to change a light bulb?
2. 1 to change the light bulb, the other to take pictures.
-
How does a feminist screw in a light bulb?
She doesn't, she just holds it in the socket and waits for the world to revolve around her.
-
How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?
Third as many as for a regular bulb.
-
How many redditers does it take to change a light bulb?
3. One to screw it in, the next to claim credit and the third to be a bot that reposts.
-
How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a light bulb?
to get to the other side
-
How many Germans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
NINE!
-
How many sociologists does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but the light bulb has to want to change.
-
How many black metalheads does it take to change a light bulb?
100. 1 to change the light bulb and the other 99 to complain about how the old light bulb was much better.
-
How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Actually agents will screw in just about anything.
-
How many people with ADD does it take to change a light bulb?
Lets go ride a bike!
-
How does a orphan change a light bulb?
They grab the stack of un-signed adoption papers, stand on top of them, then proceed to change the light bulb.
-
How many "friend zoned" guys does it take to change a lightbulb?
How many "friend zoned" guys does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just compliment it and get mad when it won't screw.
-
How many absurdist/surrealist comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
November.
-
How many children does it take to change a light bulb in America?
About 1 thousand Iraqis.
-
How many performance artists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
I don't know either, I walked out early too.
-
How many moths does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just two, but how they get in there.. I don't know. (Stolen from an old Maxim in my dad's storage)
-
How many electricians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Well, first off, it's called a lamp...
-
How many mods does it take to switch a light bulb?
deleted
-
How many archaeologists does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to change it while the other two argue about how old the old one is.
-
How many people from Svalbard does it take to change a light-bulb?
Light? What's that?
-
How many members of the coalition does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: "We are not prepared to comment on specific numbers at this time."
-
How many UPM's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None! If you'd just make it a day exterior we wouldn't be screwing around with all these damn light bulbs!"
-
How many editors does it take to change a light bulb?
A: If we change the light bulb we'll have to change everything.
-
How many physicists does it take to change a light bulb?
Two! one to change the light bulb and the other to rotate the universe!
-
How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
-
How many Black Lives Matters protesters does it take to change a light bulb?
Don't be silly, Black Lives Matters protesters can't change anything.
-
How many homeless people does it take to screw a light bulb?
does anyone know of any good jokes about homeless people.?
-
How many Anime characters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Only 1, but it takes them 15 episodes to do it.
-
How many anti-feminists does it take to screw the light bulb?
Anti feminists? Nah, they can't screw
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How many Kings of Spain does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Juan
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How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None. That's a hardware problem.
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How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. They just hold it in the socket and expect the world to revolve around them.
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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How many Californians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Californians don't screw in light bulbs, they screw in hot tubs and infinity pools.
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How many Nickelback fans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Trick question! There's no such thing as Nickelback fans. (I will be hated by few)
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How many Zionists does it take to change a light bulb?
OC Just one. And if you disagree with me, you're an anti-Semite.
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How many idiots does it take to change a light bulb?
Five - one to hold the bulb, and four to turn his ladder
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How many Narcissists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One. But he doesn't screw it in, he just holds it and the world revolves around him.
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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a light bulb?
Lets go play on our bikes.
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How many ISIS mercenaries does it take to change a light bulb?
None stupid crusader, that's a job for the hostages!
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How many boring guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One
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How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?
10. 1 to change it and 9 to say they could have done it better.
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How many blonde's does it take to change a light bulb?
A. 3. 1 to find the bulb 1 to find a ladder and 1 to find a man.
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How many Arabs does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They just sit in the dark and blame the Jews.
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How many ants does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A light bulb weighs about 50g and a single ant can lift about .2g, so it takes somewhere around 250 ants working together.
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How long does it take Han Solo to screw in a light bulb?
less than twelve parsecs.
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How many Canadians does it take to change a light bulb?
Just two. One to politely ask and the other to politely help.
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light-bulb?
None. Mice can't change light-bulbs as they are mere rodents without the physical or mental ability to do so. Not to mention it's much safer for them to pilfer food in the dark.
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How many old-timey gangsters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: We ain't sayin' nuthin'.
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How many jail guards does it take to change a light bulb?
Why does it matter Everyone knows the prison system can't change anything.
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How many Democrats does it take to change a light bulb?
It only takes one, but we weren't able to get the work done in 1 term because we inherited a really bad situation from the prior administration.
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How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to hold the light bulb and two to spin the ladder."
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How many blonde's does it take to screw In a light bulb?
3: One holds the light bulb, and the other two spin the Chair.
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How many factory farmers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, they would rather keep you in the dark!
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How many Americans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, that's a Mexican's job.
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How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Not sure, first they have to figure out which way to spin it.
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How many Bill Cosbys does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one but every time he does he causes a blackout.
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How many SJWs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
THAT'S *NOT* FUNNY!
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How many blondes does it take to... How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb?
5... 1 to hold the bulb and 4 to spin the chair
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How many bad joke tellers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One.
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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Uh...standby I'll check on that.
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How many Egalitarians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Doesn't matter, they'll just screw it one rotation one way and one rotation the other way and call it equality.
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How many Roman pirates does it take to change a light bulb?
I I
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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb?
3/5
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How many Scientologists does it take to change a light bulb?
What suppressive told you to change the light bulb Report to Ethics immediately!
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How many pessimists does it take to change a light bulb?
One, although it's probably screwed in too tight anyway.
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How many Java programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
One to generate a "ChangeLightBulb" event to the socket.
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How many C++ programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
You're still thinking procedurally! A properly designed light bulb object would inherit a change method from a generic light bulb class!"
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How many Dragonball Z characters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just one, but it takes three episodes.
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How many cost accountants does it take to change a light bulb?
Hmmm........I'll just do a few numbers and get back to you
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How many downies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Potatoe
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How many Vietnam veterans does it take to change a light bulb?
You weren't there, man!
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How many people on a beach does it take to screw in a light bulb?
depends on how many survivors there are. too soon.
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How many perverts does it take to insert a light bulb?
Only one; However, it takes an entire emergency ward to get it back out again.
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How many non-compliant Germans does it take to change a light bulb?
Nein!
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How many psychiatrists dose it take to change a light bulb?
How many psychiatrists dose it take to change a light bulb? One, but the light bulb has to want to change.
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How many people with Alzheimer's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
To get to the other side!
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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Wanna go ride bikes?
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How many Freemasons does it take to screw in a light bulb?
It's a secret!
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How many second violinists does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They can't get up that high!
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Hell you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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How many cancer patients does it take to change a light bulb?
1 and 12 people to say how inspiring it was
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two: One to hold it one to hammer it in.
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How many mothers-in-law does it take to change a light bulb?
One. She just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around her.
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How many women does it take to change a light bulb?
I don't know, but I bet we could pay them less than a group of men for the same amount of work.
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How many Chuck Norris' does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, no light bulb dare go out in the presence of Chuck Norris.
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How many groupies does it take to change a light-bulb?
None, they all know someone that does it for them.
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How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One to screw it almost all the way in and one to give it a surprising twist at the end.
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How many frat boys does it take to change a light bulb?
None, they prefer natural light
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Why is it important to have plenty of help when changing a light bulb?
Many hands make light work.
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How many philosophers does it take to... ...change a light bulb?
Define "light bulb".
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How many people does it take for Valve to change a light bulb?
Two at most.
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How many vegans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Oh don't worry, they'll let you know.
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How many people does it take to change a light bulb?
Is just one of the questions I should have asked before buying a lighthouse....
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How many ants does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A light bulb weighs about 50g and a single ant can lift about .2g, so it takes somewhere around 250 ants working together.
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How many Unidans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Six: one to screw it in and five to cheer him on loudly while standing in front of other people's bulbs so no one can see them.
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How many golfers does it take to change a light bulb?
FORE!
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How many Biebers does it take to change a light bulb?
None. There are no light bulbs in the closet. Another one: Why is Justin Bieber so pale? Because there's no light inside the closet
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?
Five. One to handle the bulb and 4 to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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How many children with Attention Deficit Disorder does it take to change a light bulb?
Let's go ride our bikes!
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How many emo kids does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, they just sit in the dark and cry.
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How many handicapped guys does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one if it's Professor X.
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How many bureaucrats does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to assure that everything possible is being done about the situation and the other one to screw it into the faucet.
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How many Pentium designers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: 1.99904274017 but that's close enough for non-technical people.
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How many FIFA officials does it take to change a light bulb?
None**. They operate in the **dark**.
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How many civil servants does it take to change a light bulb?
Twelve. One to change the bulb and eleven to do the paperwork.
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How many programmers do you need to fix a light bulb?
None, it is a hardware issue!
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How many ADD's does it take to change a light bulb?
Let's go fishing
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: It takes two. One to change the bulb and the other to kick the switch.
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How many Super Saiyans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON DRAGONBALL ZEEEEE! (I really hope this isn't a repost)
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How many blind people does it take to change a light bulb?
None if nobody's looking.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Seven one to change and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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How many black people are needed to change a light bulb?
One less now, because the one who tried to steal the light bulb was shot by the cops.
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How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb?
Apparently not 8
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How many spiders does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two.
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?
A: We can see no need for uninstallation and have therefore made no provision for light bulbs to be removed.
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?
It only takes two mice to screw in a light bulb. The hard part is getting them in there.
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How many Scottish highlanders does it take to change a light bulb?
There can be only one.
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How many Californians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Californians don't screw in light bulbs, they screw in hot tubs and infinity pools.
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How many South Americans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A Brazilian.
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How many Greeks does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One, ......A Greek will screw anything!
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How many startup CEOs does it take to change a light bulb?
Change a light bulb Pfft! We are game changers.
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How manyh grad students does it take to change a light bulb?
One, but it takes 7 years.
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How many roaches does it take to screw in a light bulb?
2 but how they got in the light bulb I will never know
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How many virgins does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just one. But he will pull it back out and stick it back in again just to make sure hes got the right hole.
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a man?
Just one, if you put it in the right place.
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How many Ayatollahs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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How many members of Coldplay does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just one, but he has to see Radiohead do it first.