Pencil Jokes
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What does a mathematician do about constipation?
Sits down and works it out with a pencil.
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What do you call two pencils fighting?
A grafight.
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What's the smelliest type of pencil?
A #2 pencil
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What kind of stretches does a pencil do?
Ticondeyoga
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How do mathematicians cure constipation?
They work it out with a pencil.
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Whats the Difference between a Third-Wave Feminist and a Pencil?
The pencil has a point
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How can you tell when a blonde is having a bad day?
When there's a tampon behind her ear and she's looking for her pencil.
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Why can't Nietzsche use pencils?
Because they're all pointless
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Who is better? The 3rd wave feminist or the pencil?
The pencil is better. It has a point.
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What does the math teacher do when he gets constipated?
Works it out with a pencil.
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What do pencils, poop and Golden State Warriors have in common?
They are all #2s.
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What does a mathematician do when they have constipation....?
They work it out with a pencil!
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What the difference between a feminist and a pencil?
The pencil has a point
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Why can't pencils have babies?
Because they have rubbers on their end.
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Why do pencils shave?
To look sharp. Credit: 3rd grade me.
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What's the difference between feminists and a pencil?
A pencil has a point.
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Where do pens and pencils go on vacation?
Pennsylvania
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What do mathmeticians do when they are constipated?
Work it out with a pencil
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Why do math teachers never get constipated?
Because they always work problems out with a pencil.
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What did one Pencil say to the other ?
Your looking Sharp!
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What did the pencil say to the sharpener?
Stop going in circles and get to the point.
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What do mathematicians do when they are constipated?
They get a pencil and work it out.
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What's the similarity between communism and a pencil?
They both only really work on paper
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How did the math teacher solve her constipation problem?
She worked it out with a pencil.
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Where do pencils go for vacation?
Pencil-vania.
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What did the Pencile say to the other pencil?
what did the pencile say to the other pencil the answer is........... Your Looking Sharp :)
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How does a mathematician get rid of constipation?
He works it out with a pencil.
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How does a mathematician deal with constipation?
He grabs a pencil and tries to work it out
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How do mathematicians deal with constipation?
They work it out with a pencil.
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What does a math teacher do when he has hemorrhoids?
He works them out with a pencil.
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Why did the boy take a pencil and paper to bed?
He was told to draw the curtains before going to sleep.
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How does an accountant relieve his constipation?
He works it out with a pencil
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What did the writing utensil take for his high sugar level?
A: Pencil-in.
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Why did the paper follow the pencil?
Because it LED THE WAY! I'm on a roll here! this is fun! Skip
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Where does Dracula buy his pencils?
Pennsylvania.
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Why did the little boy flush a pencil down the toilet?
Because it was a Number 2.
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Why did the man take a pencil to bed ?
To draw the curtains !
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What does a mathematics professor do when he is constipated?
He works it out with a pencil.
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What did the pencil say?
Nevermind, it's pointless.
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What did the constipated mathematician do?
He worked it out with a pencil.
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What does a pencil have in common with marijuana?
If it doesn't make you look smart, it's blunt.
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What do you call someone who hates pencils?
Erracist
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Why can't a nihilist use a pencil?
because they cant find the point.
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Why don't pencils and graph paper get along?
Because they're made out of graphite
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What does a Math Professor do when he's constipated?
He works it out with a pencil.
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How did the mathematician solve his constipation problems?
The same way he solved all other problems: He worked it out with a pencil and paper.
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When can't a pencil write out a check?
When it's broke.
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How do mathematicians solve constipation?
They just work it out with a pencil!
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Why does Mr. Pencil hate Mr. Pen so much?
Because he is an erascist.
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What's the difference between a strawberry and a pencil?
One's a fruit, you idiot.
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Why was the pencil in the toilet?
It was a No. 2.
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What did the Math book say to the pencil?
I see your point I've got a lot of problems.
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What did one pencil say to the other?
2B or not 2B?