Reddit Jokes
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What do you get when you combine Reddit with dry humor?
Circle jerky.
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What's the best way to receive down votes on reddit?
Wohahaha! That was funny! XD
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Where does the thumb meet its type?
At the SPACE BAR! reddit is fun! I'm staring at the keyboard tryin' to think up a joke and voila'!
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Why did Reddit's restaurant go our of business?
All of its servers were busy
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What's the difference between Reddit and Voat?
Reddit doesn't constantly have reposts from the other site.
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How did the tree get on to Reddit?
It just logged on...
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What do you get when you cross reddit and a weekend?
No new messages.
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What's long, hard and bendable and contains the letters p, e, n, i, s?
Your spine.
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Who leaked all of Reddit's most sensitive secrets?
Edward Snooden.
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How do you know you're not logged into reddit?
There are posts on the frontpage
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What did one frog say to the other?
Reddit
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What do you call a joke that gets posted over and over again on reddit?
Al-redi-reddi-tt.
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Whats the difference between reddit and 9gag?
3 hours, but it takes 1 day for it to get to Hot
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What did Elsa say to her fans on Reddit?
Leddit go
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What app do you use to browse Reddit on your phone?
9gag
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What's the best way to break up with your girlfriend?
On the front page of reddit.
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What happened to the NSFW warning on r/Jokes?
It stopped working like all those who got caught on reddit at work.
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What do you call a good joke on Reddit?
Unoriginal
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Where can you go on Reddit to ask questions?
Not /r/movies.
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How is Harrison Ford like the Reddit admins?
Both should have said no to the latest update.
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What do you call an original idea on Reddit?
A repost.
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What's the difference between a joke on Reddit and a joke on 9Gag?
About a day.
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How many "a man walks into a bar" jokes does it take to change a lightbulb?
One, but you can be sure a whole Reddit community will appear to expand the joke, make it funnier and eventually run it into the ground.
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What's the difference between people on Reddit and dead people?
Dead people had lives.
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What do you call the game that centres around weak leadership?
Reddit.
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Why is Reddit full of liberals?
All the conservatives are out working.
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Why is Reddit called "Reddit"?
The first name they came up with reminded them too much of olive oil.
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What is the biggest joke?
Reddit.
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Why won't you read this joke?
Cause you've already reddit!
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What is the difference between Reddit and a fetish party?
You might actually get me to sub here.
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Who has the most karma on Reddit?
Buddha.
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What's the difference between Reddit CEO Ellen Pao, and Yoko Ono?
about 40 years.
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How did Ellen Pao get her job as CEO or Reddit?
Deleted
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Why does Reddit have so many reposts?
Because you already read-it.
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Why don't SJWs like Reddit?
It's a real cispool.
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What happens when a pizzaman does an AMA on Reddit?
OP delivers.
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What's the difference between Reddit and 9Gag?
About 5 seconds.
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What's with all of these racist jokes on reddit?
They're starting to get quite dark
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What's better than a laxative?
Reddit.
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Why is Reddit the best place for freedom of speech?
removed
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Why was 11 afraid of 12?
Because 12 13 14!
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Whats common between Reddit jokes & Dave ?
You never get tired of seeing them again & again ...
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How is Ellen Pao so good at driving Reddit into the ground?
I thought Asian women couldn't drive &#3232&#3232
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What did Reddit say to his elderly mother when he tried to take her to a home?
Get in the Karma.
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When Gordon Ramsay saw a cute puppy gif on Reddit, why did he get mad?
Because it was
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What's the difference between a 2016 Reddit post and a 2006 Reddit post?
Removed
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What is the only thing standing between me and being rich?
I haven't hit Reddit gold yet.
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What Pixar movie will Rick Astley never let you borrow?
He's never gonna give you Up! Credit to my friend who doesn't even Reddit.
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How do you get Reddit to improve their search function?
Have CNN report on how bad it is
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What if reddit had a currency?
Would they be called creddits ( )
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What do they call Reddit in France?
Ribbit
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How are old jokes on reddit like a herpes outbreak?
You know they are going to keep coming back, and despite the fact they are weaker each time, you still don't look forward to them.
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What do you get when you cross a garden, a rabbit, and some ExLax?
For the love of everything sacred on reddit please do not make me actually key the answer....okay, let's say it together, "Salad Shooter".
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How do you know if a joke has been posted on reddit before?
Oh, they'll tell you.
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What is purple, blue, and white and spits out dad jokes?
Reddit
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What happened on Reddit yesterday?
A pao-erful change
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How do you get to the front page of reddit ?
Lack of originality
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What's the difference between an old joke and a new one?
Nothing. We're on reddit
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How do you annoy people on Reddit?
removed
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How do you know if Buzzfeed article is stolen?
You get the feeling that you've Reddit before.
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What happens when you violate Reddit's rules?
removed
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What did the Ceasar of reddit say?
I came, I upvoted, I reposted.
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Why do I not laugh at your jokes anymore?
Because I've "reddit" before
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What is Reddits favorite country?
Chi-LE!!!!!!!!!! My girlfriend came up with that one hope u guys love it as much as I do!!!!! :)
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What Happened when Feminist's found out about Reddit?
Well they deleted
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Why are Reddit jokes so overused?
I don't know, ask Dave.
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What do you call a loonie answering questions on reddit?
DollarAMA. *Only Canadians will get it, sorry.
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Why Can't Foster Kids Play Baseball?
They Don't Know Where Home Is!" Daniel , Reddit Clown
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How many didn't?
Ten. (Shame this one doesn't work too well for reddit - the funniest part of this joke is the third punchline enjoying people struggle to understand what the hell you're talking about.)
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What do you call all of the terrible jokes on reddit arranged in a circle?
Groanhenge
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Why does Reddit love Ronda Rousey so much?
she hits women
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What does Reddit share in common with the real world?
A messed up system of karma
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What do you call ice cream that robs a bank?
Heist cream Got to give credit to my friend, who sadly dosent have reddit.
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Why do women and children evacuate first in an emergency?
So the men can go on Reddit and repost this joke.
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What do Reddit and Duke University have in common?
They're both full of blue devs.
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What happens when i find a good joke?
I reddit.
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What type of animal browses Reddit?
Karma-vore
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Why does Reddit hate Pilipinos?
Everybody hates Pilipinos.
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How do you tell a good joke on reddit?
Wash it up over and over again until you get gold!
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Where does a North Korean go after he upvotes a thread on Reddit?
To the morgue.
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Whats a frogs favourite website??
REDDIT
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Whoops wrong sub. Oh wait. This has been done before, hasn't it?
You probably Reddit already.
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Why did the terrorist's post make it to the front page of reddit?
Because it blew up.
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What happens if you violate Reddit's content policy?
removed
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What the difference between Reddit and other sites?
On some of them you actually have a voat
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What did the Reddit admins do for Christmas?
removed
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What is the difference between Digg and Reddit?
People can Voat.
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Why was the Facebook post redundant?
Because I already reddit
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What did the community do when there was an injustice involving law enforcement?
Black people took to the streets. White people took it to Reddit and complained about how nobody is doing anything about it.
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What joke has recieved the most upvotes on Reddit?
Redditors.
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What do you call someone who gets Praise and Merit on Reddit?
Creddit!!!!
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What does an r/frog say?
reddit, reddit
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What do you call it when you think deeply about something you just saw on reddit?
Redditation. I am so sorry... that was horrible.
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How to you read a book?
Just reddit.
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What did the man who frequents the internet do with a book?
He Reddit.
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What's the difference between Reddit and the 1984 Universe?
You can leave Reddit.
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Why is reddit so liberal?
Because upvotes are to the left
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What did the mods say when they found me giving Reddit gold to my alt account?
He who smelt it, dealt it.
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What's white, blue , and red all over?
REDdit.
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Whats the V in DVD stand for?
Cuz if it were lying down it wouldnt make any sense. (first post to reddit, made up this joke today .. be kind)
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What's the most stupid part about telling a rude joke on Reddit?
Offensive)
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What's the difference between "Fake News" and CNN?
I don't know Reddit, that's why I'm asking you
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Why is Reddit different from Facebook?
removed
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What's the difference between Olive Garden and Reddit?
At Olive Garden the servers actually work.
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What will reddit never know?
Victoria's Secret...
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What do you call a popular joke on reddit?
repost
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How many Reddit admins does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they like to keep the mods in the dark.
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Whats the difference between Facebook and Reddit?
About two hours.
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Where does Ben Carson spend most of his time on Reddit?
r/explainlikeimfive
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What do I need a girlfriend for?
When the Reddit servers are ready to go down on me anytime?
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What did the Canadian Reddit user say?
Ehhhhh lmao
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What's all this talk about Reddit's servers being down?
Guess I can't see what everyone else sees.
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How much do I trust reddit?
I went on before seeing the new Star Wars.
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How can you tell if someone's a redditor,in real life?
Ask them if they're on reddit. I'm sorry.
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What do you call a scary unexpected post in reddit?
A Dreddit!
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How do you make the Reddit front page?
Repost)
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What is the best color?
Reddit
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What would the Reddit political party be called?
The know-kn0thing party.
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What religious group does reddit belong in?
Cat holics
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What do Reddit and building a mile long fence have in common?
Post...repost.....repost....repost...repost...
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Why do black men hate posting on reddit?
Because they can't deny that their comment was the parent.
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Why does Reddit hate Fencing?
Ripostes
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What sound does Reddit make when it blows up?
Pao! Edit: Whoa, FP gold. Thank you!
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What has shadier inner workings, Reddit or FIFA?
Still waiting to hear back from an admin.
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Why Is Reddit Called Reddit?
Because you already read it.
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Whats reddits favorite tv show?
The OC.
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What do the janitors clean the Reddit office with?
Derpentine.
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What's the difference between reddit and a fish?
fish are cool
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How many "a man walks into a bar" jokes does it take to change a lightbulb?
One, but you can be sure a whole Reddit community will appear to expand the joke, make it funnier and eventually run it into the ground.
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What is Reddit's favorite pirate?
Neckbeard
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Why aren't you studying, Billy?
Billy's Mom asked him, "Well, why aren't you studying, Billy? You have an exam tomorrow!" Billy said, "Because I've already Reddit thrice."
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How do you make a cat go "Woof!"?
Soak it in petrol and put a match to it. (This is a joke, not and instruction, Reddit)
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Why didnt the illiterate man like my post on r/Jokes?
He's never Reddit.
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What's the difference between a school of children and a terrorist camp?
I don't know, I just fly the drone Edit/apology: My friend said this to me, I thought I should share with you all, he said that I could post it here. 5 minutes later he told me he found it on reddit.... I'm sorry all.
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What did the frog with internet addiction say?
Reddit
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What is the difference between Reddit and children's television?
Children don't throw tantrums when there's a rerun of some content.
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What does Reddit and Dating have in common?
It wastes your time and you walk away with either tears or a slight chuckle.
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What did the troll say to the new user who accidentally made a repost?
Reddit already. Downvote.
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What's the deal with reddit being obsessed about puns?
I've never... META ... group of people so obsessed with puns before.. Fine, I'll leave :(:(
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How is Reddit like fencing?
Ripostes everywhere.
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Why do Muslims hate Reddit?
Haram be everywhere
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What do you call an angry Reddit mod?
deleted
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What is Reddit's favorite airliner?
Virgin airlines.
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Where do post go when they die in Reddit?
Everywhere else.
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What's the difference between a cheeesburger and Reddit gold?
A cheeseburger can't feed your ego.
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What do you award to someone who comments in a thread from a month ago?
Reddit Old
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What's the most overused punchline on reddit?
removed
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What did Reddit almost change their name to during the Victoria controversy?
Blueit. -just thought of it, sorry its a little late to the party
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Why did Snoo not check out a library book?
Because he had already Reddit.
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What's the difference between Reddit and Facebook?
About a day
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Why was the Redditors jokes so unoriginal?
Because he Reddit off the internet.
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What is the best way to receive downvotes on reddit?
Wohahaha! That was funny! XD
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What would be the worst possible thing to see on Reddit after losing your family in a car crash?
removed (two children)
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What Does Reddit stand for?
Reddit: Re-Downvote Downvote it.
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What does Uncle Vernon from Harry Potter not do on Reddit?
Post on Sundays.
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What's the difference between Reddit and 4chan?
One is a group of immature internet trolls....and the other thinks it isn't.
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How do you get rid of a Reddit admin?
Chooter
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How long does it take for George R.R. Martin to finish a Reddit post?
Answer coming Fall 2017.
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What do Steam users and Reddit admins have in common?
They don't want to pay for mods.
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What is the best spanish joke you've ever heard?
I couldnt find the spanish section of reddit
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Whats the difference between reddit and hell?
Hell bad people
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How would a pirate describe navigating Reddit on Talk like a Pirate Day?
Arduous.
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Why is Paris the city of love?
Hard P and a soft A. Modified from comment section of reddit
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Why Did 9Gag Cross The Road?
To steal a Reddit User's post on the other side.
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Why shouldn't you post to Reddit while driving?
becau
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What do you call an origional joke on Reddit?
Mine
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How does Reddit feel about Civil War jokes?
Because personally, I General Lee don't find them funny
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Where do bots go for fun?
Reddit.
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What is the most common comment on Reddit?
OPs mother.
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What did the blanket say when he fell off the bed?
Aw sheet! One of my favorite, cheesiest jokes of all time. Thought it would be a good first post to Reddit!
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Why was the Redditor mad at Reddit?
Because it made her wait seven minutes before posting something.
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What you you call a girl you meet on Reddit?
You don't.
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What did Reddit say about the post that had no comments?
Wow, such empty
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How to ruin a joke on Reddit?
Misspell the paunch line.
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What do children think of the world?
I don't know, this is the first time I've logged onto Reddit, today.
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How did the Reddit user read his newspaper?
ltORIGINAL> He Reddit
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What did the second guesser with no self esteem say to Reddit?
edit: nevermind...
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How do you find a blonde on reddit?
Look for the comments that just say "huh "
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What do you call a chicken with no neck?
A Hic. ----- wife hit me with this one today. Remove the n. E. C. And k. From chicken and it spells hic. I'm sorry Reddit.
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What is the bibliophile's favorite website?
Reddit! Courtesy of my 32 year old boyfriend. He cracks himself up.
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How do we know there are so many environmentalists on reddit?
A. Because everyone keep recycling the same jokes
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Why did the horse feel famous on Reddit?
He was gelded.
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What does Reddit need?
Ahmad.
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What's reddit without the R&D?
Edit:
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How did Reddit not fell down yet?
I mean, it is only hanging by threads...
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What do Lewinsky, Monroe, and Reddit have in common?
They all went down on a President.
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How do you spot an attention whore on reddit?
Edit: Wow, I did not expect this to get so many upvotes!
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What's the difference between reddit and resturant ?
Restaurants have better servers.
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What do you call a clever joke that doesn't make it to the front page?
A clever joke, but nobody will have Reddit...
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Why do fencers love Reddit?
Because of all the *ripostes*
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What do you call Charlie Sheen's brother if he were a financial advisor?
Emilio Investevez. Fun game/running joke friends in college used to play. Wondering if Reddit would enjoy the game too.
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What's your best racist joke?
I was just looking for some good racially insensitive jokes for my friends. Gimme your worst, Reddit.
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What's older than sand?
The reposts on reddit.
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What sounds like a frog but keeps me up all night?
reddit
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How many people does it take to tell a joke on reddit?
Two. One to post the joke and one to post a better punchline in the comments.
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What sound will reddit make when it blows up?
Nothing, it's just a website.
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Why do Fencers avoid posting on reddit?
They are afraid of the Reposte.
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What does Apu say when people leave him to browse reddit?
Thank you, Karma gain
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Which is Reddit's favourite element?
M'lybdenum.
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Why does repost always get to the top?
Most people reddit before