Redneck Jokes

  • What does NASCAR really stand for?

    Non Athletic Sport Centered Around Rednecks

  • What's the worst part about being a redneck?

    Having to see your ex at family gatherings.

  • What kind of bread do Rednecks like?


  • What is the only word that a redneck will capitalise?


  • How did the redneck find his sister in the woods?

    A: Pretty hot

  • What do rednecks say after they broke up?

    We can still be brother and sister.

  • How do you suffocate a redneck?

    Tape his mouth shut.

  • What does a pimp and a redneck have on common?

    They both like to throw a ho-down.

  • What's the difference between a redneck, and a SJW?

    A redneck's trigger actually does something

  • Why do rednecks act like such morons?

    Who says they're acting "

  • How do you know a redneck invented the toothbrush?

    If it where anyone else it woulda been called a teethbrush

  • Why are the busiest paleontologists always rednecks?

    Because they are always caught up in some type of relative dating.

  • What does a redneck do on Halloween?


  • Why do rednecks always smell like pickles, mayonnaise, and ham?

    Because they're inbred.

  • Why does a redneck hold a knife while driving?

    So he can cut corners.

  • Why do rednecks love sandwiches?

    Because they're inbred too.

  • What does a redneck and yeast have in common?

    They are both "in-bread" Downvote me to hell if you want. This is my only joke.

  • What did the redneck say to his sister?

    Oooh yeah, baby!

  • What did the redneck get on his SAT?


  • How do you get two rednecks to play Banjo in unison?

    Shoot the first one.

  • What do you call a redneck with two sheep?

    A Pimp

  • What do rednecks do on Halloween?

    They pump kin.

  • Why is it so difficult to convict a redneck?

    Because they all have the same DNA and no dental records.

  • Why do rednecks hate math?


  • What does a redneck do after she bangs her second cousin?

    She quits counting.

  • How do you make a sheep jump off a cliff?

    Put a redneck behind it.

  • What's the last thing a Redneck says before he dies?

    Watch this!

  • How do redneck Na'vi get their skin tone?

    Blue Genes... I'll be here all week

  • What do two rednecks say to each other after a break up?

    Let's go back to being cousins.

  • What are the famous last words of a redneck?

    Hey ya'll, watch this!"

  • Why do rednecks love fall?

    Because it's the only time of year they can pump kin.

  • Why does a redneck find his cousin more attractive than a stranger?

    Because it's all relative.

  • What do you call a redneck with a functioning car?


  • How do you castrate a redneck?

    Kick his sister's jaw in.

  • What do a gang member and a redneck have in common?

    They both know how to throw a good hoe down.

  • What do you call it when you said a redneck on fire?

    A firecracker

  • Why do rednecks like the doggie position?

    That way they can both watch wrestling.

  • What did the redneck say when he lost his virginity?

    Thanks mum xD

  • What did the redneck say to the Frenchman?

    You don't speak English fourchette!

  • Why did the redneck drive his pickup truck over the edge of a cliff?

    He wanted to test out his new air brakes.

  • What does a redneck do when he misses his girlfriend?

    Reload, take better aim.

  • What did one redneck say to the other?

    If you were anymore inbred, you'd be a sandwich.

  • How does the redneck help his wife with the dishes?

    He gets her Dawn.

  • How can a redneck tell his twin sisters apart?

    By taste.

  • What do rednecks call the BATF?

    The Bureau of All Things Fine.

  • What does a redneck Buddhist believe in?


  • What Does A Redneck Call It When He Visits His Cousin Outside His Town?

    Entering the friend zone.

  • What is the last thing a redneck says before he dies?

    ya'll watch this!

  • What's the difference between bacteria and rednecks?

    When looking at bacteria you can actually find some culture.

  • Why were all the rednecks sitting around an ordinary potato waiting for it to talk?

    It was a CommonTater I just made this up I swear

  • What do you call a redneck virgin?

    A 13 year old girl who runs faster than her older brothers

  • How do you know a redneck invented the tooth brush?

    We would have called it a teeth brush

  • How do you spell Mississippi?

    Redneck: Which one The river or the state

  • Why do rednecks make the best sandwiches?

    Because they are in bread.

  • How can you tell a redneck has got money?

    He gems out his dip cup

  • Why do Rednecks love cheeseburgers?

    Because they are in bread.

  • What is the difference between a Texan and a redneck?

    Texans tend to ride horses whereas rednecks ride their cousins. -American Sniper

  • What does a redneck say for foreplay?

    Brace yourself, Linda-Lou"

  • What do yeast and a redneck have in common?

    They're both usually found with beer and inbred. -&y (written by moi)

  • What do a redneck and hippie have in common?

    They both hate the government.

  • What would be a good dating site for rednecks ?

  • Why did the redneck take his cat to Walmart after running over it's tail with the lawn mower?

    Because they're the largest re-tail-er

  • What's a rednecks favorite part of archaology?

    Relative dating

  • Why was the redneck on his Iphone at his sister's funeral...?

    He was changing his relationship status to single. Dahurpy durp Dahurpy Durp Da dUrpy durp.

  • What do two rednecks getting divorced and a tornado have in common?

    Someone is going to lose a trailer.

  • What is 30 feet long and has 42 teeth?

    A bus full of rednecks

  • What did the redneck say when she lost her virginity?

    GET OFF ME DAD, you're crushing my cigarettes!

  • What did the redneck say to his ex?

    Can we still be cousins?"

  • What did the redneck get on his SATs?

    Barbecue sauce.

  • What's the difference between a zombie and a redneck?

    One is a brainless, dirty, slow moving abomination, and the other is a zombie.