Refuse Jokes
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What superheroes refuse to fight in North Carolina?
The X-Men
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Why don't anarchists accept the metric system?
They refuse to have liters.
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How do you confuse a feminist?
Tell her you refuse to allow her to make you a sandwich.
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Why did former Alabama governor George Wallace fail high school calculus?
He refused to integrate.
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Why should you always refuse to lend an Ape money?
It's dangerous to let him put the bite on you!
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Why did the woman refuse to pay for her Brazilian waxing?
A: Because it was a total rip-off.
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What do you call a guy who refuses to serve people from Finland at his bar?
A man with unfinnished buisness.
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What do you call a pair of stubborn testicles?
A refuse sack.
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Why did the Australian pirate refuse lunch?
Because he had Somalia.
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Why do Congo gamers refuse to play with Belgians?
They're afraid of getting owned
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Why did your sister refuse the gift of a Japanese car ?
Because she'd never be able to learn the language
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Why did the bird refuse Martin Luther's food?
It was on a strict diet of worms. edit: changed pronoun to avoid ambiguity
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Why did Shakespeare refuse to join the army?
He didn't like the phrase fire at will!
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What do you call someone who refuses to fart in public?
A Private Tutor.
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What do you call a marathon runner that refuses to stop?
A joggernaut.
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When Lil John goes to a hotel and they ask him if he wants turn down service, does he refuse?
That's all.
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Why did the gamer refuse to join the Boy Scouts?
He hates camping
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What's an accountant's idea of trashing his hotel room?
Refusing to fill out the guest comment card.
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Why do midgets refuse to wear tampons?
Because they keep stepping on the string.
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Why does Mike Tyson refuse to buy playstation ?
Because he is an x-boxer
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What is the difference between ID and ED?
One of them is a flimsy thing that refuses to stand up on it's own. The other is a medical condition.
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Why did I break up with my vegan girlfriend?
She refused to swallow animal by-products.
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Why did the buddhist refuse novocaine when he went to get a tooth pulled?
He wanted to transcend dental medication.
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Why did Ally refuse to do her homework, when all she had left was to square the x and y axis?
Cause Allies don't like axis powers
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Why did Einstein refuse to help people fix their cars?
Because his colleagues would call him the Quantum Mechanic.
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Why did the lawyer refuse to take payment when defending the lead singer of U2?
Because he said he was pro Bono.
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What did the Hollywood producer say to the Apes in the zoo when they refused to sign contracts to appear in his new film?
Stop playing it cagey!
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What do you get when someone refuses to pay the bills?
A Greek.
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Why did the hotel manager refuse to rent his rooms out to people?
He needed places to hide the bodies.
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Why did he refuse help?
He was in The Nile
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What happens when the cows refuse to be milked?
Udder chaos!
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What do you call it when you refuse to do core workouts?
Abstinence.
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Why did Rick Astley get fired from his job at the video store?
Because he refused to rent someone a copy of the Pixar flick "Up".
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Why didn't the feminist picnic work out?
because they all refused to make sandwiches.
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Why did the clown refuse to juggle?
He didn't have the balls to do it.
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Why does Michael Phelps refuse to aid his teammates in preparing for the Olympics?
He only Phelps himself.
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Why didn't the feminist get a job at the post office?
Because she refused to work in a mail dominated industry.
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What did they call it when NHL officials refused to allow a hamburger to play hockey in the league?
Rink injustice!
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What do people who refuse to fight use as weapons?
Their pacifists
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What do you call a law enforcement agency that refuses to buy it's own vehicles?
The pro-lease department
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Why are Werewolves such pessimists?
They refuse to look at the silver lining.
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Why did the hotel refuse hospitality to the Navy?
They didn't want their rooms covered with seamen.
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Why do Vampires make poor project managers?
Because the refuse you to meet with stake holders. (why yes, I am a dad why do you ask )
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What do you call a Sith lord who refuses to fight?
A sithy.
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Why did the Buddhist refuse Novocaine?
He wanted to transcend dental medication.
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Why did the airport luggage checker refuse to date the depressed man?
he had to much baggage
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Why did the Buddhist monk refuse Novocain?
Because he wanted to transcend dental medication.
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Why don't Muslims fill out online forms?
Because they refuse to Submit to anyone but Allah.
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Why did the feminist get fired from Subway?
Because she refused to make a sandwich
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What do you call a candelabra that refuses to hold candles?
A candle-nah-brah
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What is a good way to describe a tailor that refuses to make clothing for nuns?
Non-habit forming
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Why are refugees bad at math?
They refuse to integrate.
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Why did the feminist refuse to work at the post office?
Because it was a mail dominated industry
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What do you call a dress that refuses to learn?
Clothes-minded.
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Why did the surgeon refuse to dress for work?
He didn't want no scrubs