Wheelchair Jokes
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Why can't people in wheelchairs be looked at for too long?
The can't handle stares.
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Why didn't Superman rescue Princess Diana?
Because he was in a wheelchair.
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What did the blind deaf mute boy in a wheelchair get for Christmas?
Cancer!
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What do you call a guy in a wheelchair?
Whatever you like, what's he going to do about it anyway?
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What do you call a couple, who are both in wheelchairs?
A pair of polegics!
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What do you call a wheelchair bound Leo?
HanDicaprio. .
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What do you call a group of disabled people in a pool?
Vegetable soup. I apologise to those offended by my terrible joke. Have another Whats the hardest part of cooking a vegetable? Getting the wheelchair into the oven
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What cell service do nuns in wheelchair have?
Virgin Mobile
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How do you cook vegatables in the microwave ?
Take them out their wheelchair.
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What is the best kind of vegetable?
The one in the wheelchair.
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What's the hardest part of cooking vegetables?
Their wheelchairs
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What did the shooting range instructor say to the guy in a wheelchair?
Parachute
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Why are people in wheelchairs always getting taken advantage of?
Because they're easy to push around and never stand up for themselves
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What do you call a none in a wheelchair?
Virgin Mobile I'm not sorry (PS, if this is a repost, I'm sorry that I didn't see the first time it got posted 2 years ago. Please don't accuse me of reposting)
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What part of the vegetable can you not put in a mixer?
The wheelchair
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What did Steven hawking say when he first got his wheelchair?
I can't stand being in this
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What is the hardest part of a vegetable?
The wheelchair. sorry
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Whats it called when you 69 with someone who is sitting in a wheelchair?
Meals on wheels
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What did Dahmer do when he finished his vegetables?
A: He threw away their wheelchairs!
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Whats the hardest part about cooking vegetable?
getting the wheelchair in the oven.
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Whats the hardest thing about microwaving vegtables?
fitting the wheelchair in the microwave.
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What's his secret?
He's in a wheelchair
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What's the difference between a fruit and a vegetable?
A fruit doesn't need a wheelchair
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What is the only inedible part of a vegetable?
The wheelchair
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Who do you call when your wheelchair gets a flat?
Cripple A.
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What type of people can you not stand?
People in wheelchairs
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What do you call Charlie Sheen in a wheelchair?
ROLAIDS
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What's the hardest part about cooking a vegetable?
Fitting the wheelchair in the oven.
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What do you call a nun in a wheelchair?
Virgin mobile.
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What is the most annoying part of boiling vegetables?
Finding a pot big enough for the wheelchair.
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How is my wife doing?
Doctor: I'm so sorry. The accident has left her in a vegetative-like state and I don't think she'll ever recover. She can barely move her limbs, if at all, and will be confined to a bed or wheelchair without the ability to ever walk again. You'll need to care for her 24/7, clothe her, feed her, bathe her, and she'll have no control of her bladder or bowels. Again, I'm so, so, sorry... ..... ..... ..... Just kidding! She's dead.
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Why do people in wheelchairs wear shoes?
Do they think they're gonna magically start walking
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What did the man in the wheelchair say when he returned the hat he borrowed?
Thanks for the handy cap.
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What do you do when you are done with the vegetables?
You put them back in the wheelchair
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Why do people in wheelchairs have such low confidence?
Because they never stand up for themselves.
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Which part of a vegetable is the hardest to chew?
The wheelchair
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What do you get when you cross the world's most famous skater with the world's best physicist?
A video game so realistic, when you screw up you have to play in a wheelchair.
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What do you call... What do you call it when a person in a wheelchair tries to get through a non-automatic door?
A tard time
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What's the hardest part to cook in a vegetable ?
The wheelchair
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Why are you always pushing me around and talking behind my back?
I said, "well, you are in a wheelchair".
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How do you know when your vegetables are boiled?
Their wheelchair floats to the top.
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What's the hardest part of washing a vegetable?
putting them back in the wheelchair
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What is the worst thing about farming vegetables?
The wheelchairs are too expensive.
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What should you do before cooking the vegetables?
Remove the wheelchair
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Why you need that?
You already have a wheelchair.
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Which part of a vegetable isn't edible?
His wheelchair.
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Why do they allow people in wheelchairs to bring carry-ons onto a plane?
Aren't they themselves a carry-on?
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What does a shopping cart and a wheelchair have in common?
They both can be used to carry vegetables....
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What is the difference between Stephen Hawking and his E-Wheelchair?
If you repair both, the E-Wheelchair is the only thing running again