What do you call a midget psychic on the run from the law?

A small medium at large.

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What did the headlines read after the midget fortune-teller escaped from jail?

Small medium at large.

What do you call a psychic midget wanted by the police?

A small medium at large.

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What do you do when your mother-in-law is swaying towards you?

You pull the trigger again.

What's the definition of mixed emotions?

When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your brand new car.