What pen company did Lance Armstrong buy?

Uniball

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Why did the Irishman buy two tickets to the zoo?

One to get in and one to get out.

What is agitated buy joyful?

A washing machine

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What's Lance Armstrong's favorite pen brand?

Uniball. What's a Muslim's favorite pen Arab Bic. What's a deaf-mute's favorite pen Pentel.

What's one thing Lance Armstrong can still make money from?

LIESTRONG bracelets.