Why did Ellen Pao punch the puppy?

Cause shes terrible.

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S Jokes More S Jokes

Whats the difference between a good haircut and a bad haircut?

About 3 weeks.

Whats the difference between love, ture love, and showing off?

spit, sallow, and gargle.

Puppy Jokes More Puppy Jokes

How many puppies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Do you know yet Me (in a sea of puppies): No, they haven't done it. Bring more

What's the difference between a singer-songwriter and a puppy?

A puppy eventually grows up and stops whining. Thanks to PuddinHead742 for this one.

Cause Jokes More Cause Jokes

What causes German Earthquakes?

Teutonic Plates. I'm sorry I'll find my own way out

What causes a half-moon?

Student: When you can't get your jeans over your thighs.

Punch Jokes More Punch Jokes

Why would somebody punch a sheep?

Ewe wouldn't understand.

Who would win a fight between a taco and a hotdog?

so I punched him in the head.

Ellen Pao Jokes More Ellen Pao Jokes

What do you call a 7 foot tall Ellen Pao?

Pao Ming.

What's Ellen Pao's husband's favourite web plugin?

Ponzi Buddy.