What did Mustafa's dad say after he founded Turkey?

attaturk.

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How did the jury find the hamburger?

Grill-ty as charred!

Why are quantum physicists bad lovers?

When they find the position, they can't find the momentum. When they find the momentum, they can't find the position.

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Who's the only one who doesn't say thanks on Thanksgiving?

The Turkey.

Why can't Vin Diesel differentiate Thanksgiving Turkey from his best friend?

Because they're both roasted