What do a wedding and a funeral have in common?

At the end of the day, a stiff gets buried either way.

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Bury Jokes More Bury Jokes

Why Are Germans Buried 20 Feet Underground?

Because deep down they're real nice

Why is it illegal for a man living in North Carolina to be buried in South Carolina?

Because he's alive.

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

How many seconds are there in a day in Africa?

Seconds? They barely get firsts!

Why Isn't The Media Covering This?

the media asks other media, peering into its media mirror, media-ing before a day of media in media.

End Jokes More End Jokes

What is dark and hairy on the outside, soft and moist on the inside, starts with a C, ends with a T, and has a U and an N in it?

A coconut

What does a novice woodworker have in common with a constipated woodworker?

In the end, both are lucky to produce a stool.

Funeral Jokes More Funeral Jokes

What song did Kim Jong Il request be played at his funeral?

Journey - Don't Stop Bereaving.

What does a Necrophiliac get at funerals?

Mourning Wood

Wedding Jokes More Wedding Jokes

What did the sheep use to shave before his wedding?

Elopping shears

What's the best moment of your life?

me: That time I won a stuffed dino- wife: That didn't involve a dinosaur me: Our wedding

End Day Jokes More End Day Jokes

What do a wedding and a funeral have in common?

At the end of the day, a stiff gets buried either way.

What will I have at the end of the day?

Three bags of skittles and a small body to hide.