What do you do when a bird attacks you?

Duck.

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Duck Jokes More Duck Jokes

What's your emergency, sir?

Me: I'm being taken away by ducks! I'm being- 911: Please don't do this, sir M: AbDUCKted! 911: *hangs up*

What does Dr. Oz do when you throw scientific evidence at his head?

Ducks like a quack.

Bird Jokes More Bird Jokes

When should you buy a bird?

When it's going Cheep.

What bird is most likely to inspire a revolution?

A pigeon... "Coup, coup"

Attack Jokes More Attack Jokes

How do you stop clowns from attacking you?

Go for the juggler

Why did the Mexican army attack the Alamo with only 2000 soldiers?

they only had one pickup