What is Apple's CEO's favourite TV show?

Lost

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What do a hurricane and a divorce in Virginia have in common?

Screaming, crying, and somebody loses a trailer!

What is worse than blacking out after a crazy night and losing money?

Blacking out and gaining money.

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What's an Apple Scottish self-aware computer called?

I, Mac.

How many Apple employees does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

I don't know, because they charge you $500 for the iLightbulb.