What phrase would a neckbeard who watches South Park use the most?

M'Kay

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What do you call people who use the pull out method as form of birth control?

Parents.

Why is Tina Fey so good with her use of irony?

It's in the name...

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How many dwarfs does take to change a light bulb?

It can vary, but It's quite hilarious to watch.

Can I watch the TV?

Yes, but don’t turn it on.

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What's the phrase for when a bird spills a drink?

Party fowl.

Where did Santa meet his wife?

Conjunction junction, they specialize in hooking up words, phrases, and Clauses

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Why didn't Drake head on down to South Park?

He would never leave his woes behind.

What do you get when the Pillsbury dough boys bend over?

Dough-nuts (South Park reference again just spreading it).