How do you know a presidential candidate is lying?

Their lips are moving.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why did the privileged white guy fail his algebra test?

He didn't know enough about inequalities

How do you know accountants have no imagination?

They named a firm PricewaterhouseCoopers.

Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

What do you do when you see a black man lying on the floor?

You stop laughing and shoot him again.

How does that make you feel?

ME: "Mphh mophh wampph." T: Again, this works better if you don't lie face down on the couch.

Lip Jokes More Lip Jokes

Why did the blonde give up on trying to blow up a car?

She burnt her lips on the exhaust pipe

How do you get people to quit smoking?

Cut off their lips

Presidential Candidate Jokes More Presidential Candidate Jokes

How do these presidential candidates sleep at night?

With an electorate blanket.

What do you get if you ask a former presidential candidate to write a piece of music about a formula for solving a problem based on a sequence of specified actions?

An algorithm.