How many programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Zero.

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Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many surrealists does it take to screw in a fish?

Lightbulb.

How many scientists it takes to change a lightbulb?

None *et al.*

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How many cashiers does it take to change a light bulb?

Are you kidding They won't even change a five dollar bill."

How many Global Warming nutjobs does it take to change a light bulb?

None, they don't use light bulbs. They live in caves and use no forms of artificial energy because they wouldn't want to be perceived as hypocrites or morons.

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How many do you have?

7yo: Zero. Me: ZERO 7yo: I said it was empty.

What'd the scientist say to the man who was frozen to absolute zero?

Are you 0K