Why I'm Breaking Up With You" Him: Wait, what the--?

Me: Please hold all questions until the end.

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Break Jokes More Break Jokes

How did Helen Keller break her arms?

She tried to read a road sign going 45mph

What's worse than getting 7 years of bad luck from breaking a mirror?

Getting a lifetime of bad luck from breaking a condom.

Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

What's going on?

Me: The kids gave me this *holds up Dad Is #1 mug* W: That's sweet H: Sweet They think I'm pee!

How does a feminist change a lightbulb?

By holding the bulb up to the socket and waiting for the world to revolve around them.

End Jokes More End Jokes

Why does VALVE end with 2?

Because they can't count to

Why did the poor dog chase his tail?

Because he was trying to make both ends meet.

Wait Jokes More Wait Jokes

What's with the knives?

Wait, stop. Please stop!" - pumpkin

What does a bodybuilder do while waiting in a long line?

Weights

Question Jokes More Question Jokes

What did Shakespeare ask his doctor when he was afraid he had tuberculosis?

TB or not TB, that is the question.

What do you call a Vulcan philosopher who only responds in questions?

Spocrates.