How do you turn an old dishwasher into a snowblower?

You give her a shovel and tell her to get to work.

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Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

Who, you ask, turns the AC on during a polar vortex?

Sociopaths, fascist dictators, my boyfriend.

What did Matthew McConaughey yell at the drive that was about to miss his turn?

A right a right a right!

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

Why didn't the feminist get a job at the post office?

Because she refused to work in a mail dominated industry.

What kinds of vegetables did Ghandi prefer?

Peace and carrots... Thought this up at work today. I'm sure it's been done before but it made me chuckle...

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What does the Sargeant of the Knowledge division always tell his troops to get?

in formation

How did Helen Kellers parents punish her?

They gave her a basketball and told her to read.

Shovel Jokes More Shovel Jokes

What do you call a man with a shovel in his head?

Doug

What's more fun then swinging a baby on a clothes line?

Stopping it with a shovel.

Snowblower Jokes More Snowblower Jokes

Why did the snowman smile?

Because the snowblower is coming.

Whats red, white, and hangs from a telephone pole?

A dead baby shot out of a snowblower.