What would Kim Jong-Il be doing if he was still alive today?

Scratching at the lid of his coffin.

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Scratch Jokes More Scratch Jokes

What is the difference between a dog and a viola?

A: The dog knows when to stop scratching.

Why does homemade bread not make your throat itch?

It's made from scratch

Today Jokes More Today Jokes

Where are you and Mom going tonight?

Me: To meet with your teacher. 7: Oh, you don't need to. I already saw her today.

What would George Washington do if he were alive today?

Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

Coffin Jokes More Coffin Jokes

What did the casket say to the sick casket?

Are you coffin

Why are graveyards so noisy?

Because of all the coffin.

Lid Jokes More Lid Jokes

Why is ok to leave the lid off a basket of socialist crabs?

Because whenever one of them climbs to the top, the others drag it back down.

Why are sardines the stupidest fish in the sea ?

Because they climb into tins close the lid and leave teh key outside !

Kim Jong Il Jokes More Kim Jong Il Jokes

How did Kim Jong-Il begin his audio autobiography?

Dear Reader"

What song did Kim Jong Il request be played at his funeral?

Journey - Don't Stop Bereaving.