Why can't you tell puns to a kleptomaniac?

because they take everything literally (p.s. you can steal this joke if you want)

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Why did Superman dump Lois for Wonder Woman?

He decided he wanted to date someone in the same League.

Why does vampire Superman want to go out?

Because he doesn't want to be around the crypt tonight. (you can tell i made that up)

Pun Jokes More Pun Jokes

What's better than a rose on your piano?

Tulips on your organ EDIT: This blew up. (No pun intended)

What is the main ingredient of a fractal fondue?

Mandel broth Ha ha ha The puns I make up while working as a grocery cashier..

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How do you know if someone has a Samsung phone without asking?

Don't worry, they've already told you the superior qualities it has over all the other smart phones by this time.

Why did Bossy tell the cowpoke to leave her calf alone?

She thought children should be seen and not herded!

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

What sounds like a joke, but isn't funny?

an anti-joke.

What language does a boxer who punches jokes speak?

Punjabi-ng.

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Why did the two most senior nuns in the convent break up a German terror plot to steal millions in bearer bonds?

Old habits die hard

Why can't you tell puns to a kleptomaniac?

because they take everything literally (p.s. you can steal this joke if you want)

Kleptomaniac Jokes More Kleptomaniac Jokes

Why was the kleptomaniac frustrated by that joke "why can't you explain puns to kleptomaniacs?

He couldn't take a joke.

Why don't kleptomaniacs get jokes?

Because they take everything literally.

P.S. Jokes More P.S. Jokes

Why can't you tell puns to a kleptomaniac?

because they take everything literally (p.s. you can steal this joke if you want)

What's an Xbox fanboys' least favourite film?

P.S. I Love You