Why do we have a Thanksgiving holiday?

Student: "So we know when to start Christmas shopping!"

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know if you have amnesia?

I don't know.

What did the child with no hands get for his birthday?

Nobody knows yet.

Start Jokes More Start Jokes

What's a word that starts with "u" and ends with "w"?

Cloning.

What's wrong with it?

Doesn't start

Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

Where were you on Friday?

Me: It was a holiday. Boss: HALLOWEEN IS NOT A PAID HOLIDAY! Me: It is if you go as Christmas. Boss:...

What is the difference between dragons and dinosaurs?

Dinosaurs aren't old enough to smoke. Told to me by my niece at christmas.

Student Jokes More Student Jokes

What is "attempted theft" exactly?

I mean it's not like you see school librarians seeing a student use Wikipedia on one of the computers and puts them in detention for "attempted plagiarism"

Why are you late?

Teacher: Why are you late? Student: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill. Teacher: That's nice. Were you helping him look for it? Student: No. I was standing on it.