Yell Jokes

Stand in the middle of the street. If someone yells, "hey, get out of the street" you're in the US. If they yell, "get out of the street, eh" you're in Canada

Why can't ewoks yell in the house?

Because they have to use their Endor voices.

Why did the little pig hide the soap?

He heard the farmer yell "Hogwash!"

How do you make Ben Carson yell?

Watch a movie with him.

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What did Jeffery Dahmer yell when he jumped in the pool?

CANNIBAL!!!

What do you call a grandpa who couldn't understand why his email wanted to upload his attachment to share it?

An old man yelling at the cloud

How do you get a little old lady to yell the F word?

Get another little old lady to yell "Bingo!"

Why did all most of the black soldiers die in Vietnam?

When the commander yelled "GET DOWN", they all started dancing.

When a guy yells out, "Linda why didn't you give your mom any grandkids?

She yelled back, "Because I swallowed them all!"

How do you get an 80 year old woman to say f***?

Have another 80 year old woman yell "bingo!"

Why did you stop your car get out and yell "coward" at the traffic signal?

Motorist: The light just turned yellow.

What has four legs and yells "Hodi doh, hodi doh?

Two black guys trying to catch an elevator.

What did the Italian bigfoot say when someone yelled, "Hey Abominable Snowman, are you ready to go?

Not-a-Yeti"

How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word?

Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!

What do I do?

Someone else yells "Call 911!" The blonde yells back "What's the number "

What lives in the sea and yells?

A: A clam shouter.

How would you like to make a donation to our local orphanage?

Dad: yea sure yells up to me son, you live with this guy now!

Why was Han yelling at Chewbacca on their first day on the Millenium Falcon?

Because Chewie was making too many wookie mistakes!

How did one goldfish get the attention of another goldfish?

He yelled, "A u, fish!"

Why did all the other toys throw RaggedyAnn out of the toy box?

She kept on sitting on Pinocchio's face yelling "Lie to me, lie to me!"

What does a barber yell when he plays hide-and-go-seek?

Ready or not, hair I comb!

Why did the director yell at Kick at the set of Punchkicker 5?

Because he said Punch's line.

How many spoiled rich girls does it take... ...to change a light bulb?

Just one, she yells, "DAAAAADDY, I need a new house!"

What did carbon yell at gold while trying to get his attention?

A! U!!! If it doesn't make sense tell it so someone out loud. Pretty sure this is my first original joke :)

What do you call it when a feminist yells so much she spits on your face?

A femijizm

Why is there lipstick on your collar?

she yelled. "It's part of the design," I said, opening up my wardrobe, "Look, I have the entire collection."

What does velcro yell as it charges into battle?

ATTACH!

Why was that guy yelling at you?

flashback to me ignoring the "one per customer" sign me with a mouthful of cheese samples No idea

What do toilets yell when they ride roller coasters?

Weeeeeeeee!!!

How do I get to the other side of the river?

The blonde yells back "You are on the other side!"

What do you yell when a woman falls of a boat?

Full speed ahead

What did the Mexican carpeting salesman yell to promote his business?

Underlay! Underlay!

Who's in there?

He yells He gets a reply "jean-claude van damme" All 4 of you,get out!

Why did the Islamic woman die when she fell into the ocean?

She thought to yell for help, but her husband was nowhere around to grant her permission to do so.

Why can't Ewoks yell and scream in the house?

They have to use their Endor voices.

Why does mom always yell at you?

Me: Marriage is complicated. 4: Is it because you're stupid

Why did the musician give his daughters the same name?

So he could yell "Anna 1, Anna 2!"

What are you guys yelling about?

them: YOU'RE DRIVING

How many acrobats does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. One to change it and one to yell "Ta-daa!" when he's done.

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F Word Jokes More F Word Jokes

How do you get a little old lady to yell the F word?

Get another little old lady to yell "Bingo!"

How do you get three old ladies to say the "F" word?

Yell "BINGO!"

Wright Jokes More Wright Jokes

Why, with twice the population of the United States at the time didn't China invent the airplane first?

Well, two Wongs don't make a Wright.

Why were the inventors of the airplane correct in thinking they could fly?

Because they were Wright.

Swallow Jokes More Swallow Jokes

What did u do last night?

Me: I drowned my swallows in whiskey Don't u mean sorrows Me covering tub of dead birds: is that the saying

What type of tea is hard to swallow?

Reality

Race Car Jokes More Race Car Jokes

Why did everyone turn away when the race car drove past?

It had a SPOILER on it.

What does a flower in a race car yell?

Petal to the nettle!

Gardener Jokes More Gardener Jokes

What did the gardener yell when his vegetarian friend visited?

Run Berry, run!

What did the gardener say to the rose?

Hello, bud.

Cardboard Jokes More Cardboard Jokes

What do you call two homeless people hitting each other with pieces of cardboard?

A pillow fight

What do you call two homeless people hitting each other with cardboard?

Pillow fight.

Canada Jokes More Canada Jokes

What do you call a German living in Canada?

A leder hoser.

How do you get Amy Schumer, Rosie O'donnell and Lena Dunham to move to Canada?

Piece of cake.

Linda Jokes More Linda Jokes

What's that awful thing called... M: ... J: You wake up with it after you drink?

M: Linda.

Why was Linda so mad on her wedding day?

Her soon to be husband forgot how to groom.