How do you know when a woman's about to say something smart?

When she starts her sentence with "A man once told me" .

Previous Random Joke Next

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What is the difference between a dog and a mailbox?

If you don't know you must lose a lot of mail.

How do you know when you have a high sperm count?

Your partner has to chew before swallowing...

Start Jokes More Start Jokes

How do you start to politely tell someone that their God isn't in the stars?

Well... If it's any constellation..."

What word starts with N, ends with R, and you never wanna call a black guy?

Neighour

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

How can you tell if a man is happy?

A. Who cares

What does a Jamaican do when he sees a spaceman?

He parks his car, man.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How can a blind person tell if they're home?

They check the architexture.

What did the Chinese man say when ophthalmologist told him he had a cataract?

No, I have a Rincoln Continental!*

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What's the leading cause of obesity in women?

Wedding rings

What did the woman from Finland say after seeing an old man fall in the water, knowing he couldn't swim?

Oh no, Helsinki! He Finnish!"

Sentence Jokes More Sentence Jokes

Why was Jared Fogle upset?

Because he was sentenced to over 15 years in prison.

How's my life?

Let's just say I'm starting a lot of sentences with "let's just say".