What is the difference between a lawnmower and a soprano sax?

A: You can tune the lawnmower and the owner's neighbors don't mind if you don't return the sax when you borrow it.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between Personal Injury lawyers and Congress?

A: No fee--If No Recovery!

What's the difference between a golfer and a skydiver?

A golfer goes "Whack, crap!", and a skydiver goes " Crap, whack!".

Mind Jokes More Mind Jokes

What happens when you anger a brain surgeon?

They will give you a piece of your mind.

When is your mind like a rumpled bed?

When it isn't made up yet.

Return Jokes More Return Jokes

What happened to the girl who went fishing with a group of men?

She returned home with a red snapper.

Why did the cows return to the marijuana farm?

It was the pot calling the cattle back.

Tune Jokes More Tune Jokes

What was Beethoven's favorite food?

BA-NA-NA-NAAA!!!!! (to the tune of Beethoven's 5th symphony)

How do you make two Oboists play in tune with one another?

Shoot one of them.

Borrow Jokes More Borrow Jokes

What did Larry McMurtry say when his neighbor asked to borrow a bar of soap?

He said "Sure! I could loan some Dove".

What is the difference betwen a blonde and a Lamborghini?

You don't let your friends borrow your Lamborghini.

Sax Jokes More Sax Jokes

Why did the bear start playing music when the priest tried to absolve him of his sins?

Because the priest said "Bear, atone" and the bear thought he said "baritone" as in "play the baritone sax now". The bear immediately started wailing away on the sax, rocking back and forth so hard he knocked over all the prayer candles and almost snapped his own spine. All the priest could do was ask the lord for the strength needed to get this bear into heaven.

Why couldn't they show the orchestra concert on TV?

There was too much sax and violins.

Lawnmower Jokes More Lawnmower Jokes

What do you do if your lawnmower stops working?

Deport him back to Mexico

What's the difference between a lawnmower and a bagpipe?

A. You can tune the lawnmower and the owner's neighbors are upset if you borrow the lawnmower and don't return it.

Owner Neighbor Jokes More Owner Neighbor Jokes

What's the difference between a lawnmower and a bagpipe?

A. You can tune the lawnmower and the owner's neighbors are upset if you borrow the lawnmower and don't return it.

What is the difference between a lawnmower and a soprano sax?

A: You can tune the lawnmower and the owner's neighbors don't mind if you don't return the sax when you borrow it.