What is the difference between the regular police and the secret service?

The secret service is the only police that gets in trouble if a black person dies. Shamelessly stolen from the correspondents' dinner.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a normal woman and a witch?

The spelling Teehee

Whats the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottish farmer?

Mick Jagger sings eh you, get offa mai cloud, but the Scottish farmer says eh McLeod, get offa mai ewe!

Police Jokes More Police Jokes

Why did the police arrest the pedo sheep?

Because he was on the lam.

What's worse than having your car impounded by the police?

Impounding your mother

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What do lawyers do after they die?

They lie still.

What do you do when a timeline dies?

Barry it.

Steal Jokes More Steal Jokes

What do you get if your Kia is stolen in Finland?

No Kia

How does a coat steal something?

They jacket

Black Person Jokes More Black Person Jokes

What's the word that starts with an "N" that no one wants to call a black person?

Neighbor.

What word that begins with "N" and ends with "R" do you never want to call a black person?

Neighbor

Trouble Jokes More Trouble Jokes

Why do pirates have trouble walking?

Arrrr-thritis

Why did the chiropractor have trouble waiting behind people?

Because he didn't know what alignment. I hope this one cracks you up!

Secret Service Jokes More Secret Service Jokes

How do you tell the difference between Al Gore and the secret service when they're in the same room?

Al Gore's the stiff one.

Why do you want to join the Secret Service?

Me: "It's a secret." Job interviewer: "You got the job."