Why did you leave me here all alone?

Where o where are you tonight? Why did you leave me here all alone? I searched the world over and thought I found some one You met a zombie and pblblthpth you were gone.

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World Jokes More World Jokes

How many Anti-Vaxxers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

As a mother, I choose not to screw it in. Light bulbs are dangerous weapons created by the Soviet Union, and I will not screw it in; it could severely hurt my child. As everyone knows, light bulbs are the principle source of autism in this world, and I have to take a stand on it.

How many teenage girls does it take to screw..... in a lightbulb?

Just one to hold it up as the whole world revolves around her.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What do you call a guy with no arms &amp no legs laying in a pile of leaves?

Russel

What does a tree do when it goes on vacation?

It packs its trunk and leaves.

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

Who else have gone through this Sarcasm?

Me: Baby, I was thinking about you so sending you She: Thanks for Thinking

What did the horse say to the other horse?

Hay,I thought you knew horses couldn't speak!

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

Where did that offensive joke post go?

I'm pretty sure I saved it to make reference to eventually and now I cannot find it. There was some gold in there.

What do you get when you cross Hilter, the Terminator, and Cthulhu?

Don't stick around to find out!

Zombie Jokes More Zombie Jokes

What do zombies use to prepare their turkeys for cooking on the smoker?

Briiiiines...

How do zombies celebrate Halloween?

They paint the town dead!

Meet Jokes More Meet Jokes

What is the good thing about Alzheimer's disease?

That you get to meet new people everyday!

Why do dogs chase their tails?

A: They want to make ends meet.

O Jokes More O Jokes

Why is the O in Opossum silent?

Because it's playing dead.

How many vowels are in the word 'vowel'?

Four. O, double-u and e.

Tonight Jokes More Tonight Jokes

What moved less than Jenny McCarthy's forehead tonight?

Mariah Carey's mouth.

What are your best family friendly Christmas jokes?

I need some for tonight.

Search Jokes More Search Jokes

What do you call a search for small guitars?

Uke hunt!

How do you find Will Smith in the winter?

You search for Fresh Prints.