Why does Mom wear makeup?

Me: To look pretty. 5: But she's already pretty. Me: Aww. 5: Dad, you should wear makeup.

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Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why couldn't the boy look at the Milky Way?

He was galactose intolerant.

What looks better... than roses your piano?

Tulips on your organ.

Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

What do we call a wireless mouse?

Hamster.

Who was that coughing in the background?

Me : Oh, that was Denise. Dad: Oh, da' niece I thought it was da' nephew. Buh dum tsssssssss

Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

What do your mom and Jesus have in common?

They both got nailed

How about her mom?

Has she said anything

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

What cologne do engineers wear?

Elon's musk

What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandles?

Philippe Philoppe

5 Jokes More 5 Jokes

How do you cut a turd into 5 pieces?

Squish it in your hand.

What happens if the baby pees?

Pregnant wife: She won't. She waits till she's born 5: Right. Just like no one pees in the pool

Makeup Jokes More Makeup Jokes

Why does Mom wear makeup?

Me: To look pretty. 5: But she's already pretty. Me: Aww. 5: Dad, you should wear makeup.

Why doesn't Asia wear makeup?

Because it clogs its SINGAPORES!

Aww Jokes More Aww Jokes

How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb?

One, and ten people to stand around clapping and saying "Aww, how brave."

Why are you still using it?

Sentimental attachment. -It just caught fire. -Aww, just like old times.