Why should you never take a swordfish out to dinner?

Because you'll get stuck with the bill, and if you don't have money to pay the restaurant will call the cods on you. Fin.

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Stick Jokes More Stick Jokes

Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangaroot?

One's a marsupial, the other's a Geordie stuck in a lift

Why did the piece of gum cross the road?

It was stuck to the chicken.

Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

Why do zoos pay for simian liability insurance?

To avoid monkey suits

Why didn't Greece vote for Tyrion?

Because a Lannister always pays his debts.

Cod Jokes More Cod Jokes

What is the difference between a portuguese woman and a sea lion ?

One of them has shiny bodyhair and smells like cod, the other one is a mammal that lives in the sea.

What do you call it when a soldier gets laid?

Tactical Insertion.* What do you call it when a COD player gets laid *Lies.*

Restaurant Jokes More Restaurant Jokes

What did the Mexican... What did the Mexican man order at the country musician themed restaurant?

A Reba!

Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

There was no atmosphere

Bill Jokes More Bill Jokes

What should you do if windows crashes cost you a lot of money?

A: You should bill Gates.

How does Bill keep Gennifer Flowers away from the White House?

A: He keeps offering to send Ted Kennedy over to give her a ride.

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

Why are hippies against capitalism?

Because money doesn't grow on trees.

How do Filipinos count money?

One-a two-a three-a four-a another-a ...

Dinner Jokes More Dinner Jokes

What do you call a fish with no eyes?

Dinner

Who's there ! Bert ! Bert who ?

Bert the dinner !

Swordfish Jokes More Swordfish Jokes

Which fish dresses the best?

The Swordfish - It always looks sharp!

What is a knight's favourite fish?

A swordfish!