Good Jokes

Oranges have thick skin. Let the downvotes fly, people! You've only got one! Edit: Did not expect this joke to get this good of a reception. Thanks, guys!

What's the best part about Dragon Ball Z?

Find out in the next episode of Dragon! Ball! Z!

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What's the best part about being an orphan?

All your chips and candy bars are family sized.

What is the best part of Pokemon Go?

I can ride my bike indoors and professor oak can't do anything to stop me.

What's the best part about getting a puppy?

Getting new shoes every week.

How to tell the difference between a bad, a good and an excellent accountant ?

When you ask them "2+2 is ?":

What's the best part of having Alzheimer's?

You get to meet new people everyday!

What does a gynocologist and a pizza man have in common?

Thay can smell the goods, but they can't taste them.

What's the best part about banging twenty two year olds?

There's twenty of them.

What's the best part of Chinese food?

The 4/10 cookie

What's the best part of having a kid?

The chewy center.

What's the best part about getting head from an infant?

Watching the soft spot move.

Dock Tok Presents…The Good, the Dad, and the Punny: Jokes from the Water’s Edge

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What's the best part about going in without a condom?

The abortion.

This joke may have profanity.

What's the best part of growing up in Compton?

No bad dad jokes.

What's the best part about living in Flint, Michigan?

Leaded gasoline is pretty cheep!

What's the best part of being a necrophiliac?

In the bedroom, it doesn't take much effort to make your lover's jaw drop.

Why do black people have white palms?

There is little bit of good in all of us. p.s. not racist, my shadow is black.

What is the best part about taking a shower?

Not being able to see yourself in the mirror afterward.

Whats the best part of living in Switzerland?

Im not too sure either but the flags a big plus.

What's the best part about sleeping with twenty five year olds?

There's twenty of them.

What's the best part about sleeping with a Cubs fan?

They're used to disappointment.

What's the best part about abortions?

They never get old

Jokes for Kids: The Best Jokes, Riddles, Tongue Twisters, Knock-Knock jokes, and One liners for kids: Kids Joke books ages 7-9 8-12

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What is the best part of a Jonestown joke?

The punchline

Whats the best part about dating a black girl?

You rarely have to meet their dad.

Why is toilet paper no good for wrapping presents?

Cos it's tear-able.

What's the best part about bangin' twenty six year olds?

You get to meet Jared Fogel.

What's the best part of an ISIS joke?

The Execution. Hehe...get it? No? Fine I'll be-heading off now.

What's the best part about Subway sandwiches?

the tiny little buns

What do they have in common ?

Both of them can sniff "the goods" but no one can touch !

What's the best part about buying dishes that are made in Mexico?

They wash themselves.

What's the best part of a woman?

between 18 and 24 yrs

What's the best part about locking your keys in the car at an abortion clinic?

Plenty of coat hangers.

This joke may have profanity.

What's the best part of a boxer's joke?

The punch line Found in BL magazine

Why wasn't Boy George any good at English?

because he always put 5 commas before chameleon.

Whats the best part about living in Switzerland?

Not sure, but the flag is a big plus.

What's the best part of having kids?

Making them.

What is the best part about showering with a 14 year old girl?

If you slick her hair back just right, she looks nine!

What's the best part of having Miley Cyrus over for thanksgiving dinner?

Unlimited twerky

What's the best part about going to a holocaust museum?

Free fap material

What's the best part of divorce?

Two Kwanzaas

What is the best part about duct tape?

It can turn "no, no, no!" Into "mmm, mmm, mmm"

What's the best part of an asynchronous dog?

It's non barking! Hopefully some software people get this one

What's the best part about dating a homeless chick ?

You can drop her off anywhere

What's the best part about showering with a 5 year-old?

The water washes away her tears

What's the best part of two lesbians marrying?

Two cooks in the house.

What's the best part about dating 26 year olds?

There's twenty of them.

What's the best part about dating a homeless girl?

You can drop her off anywhere!!

What's the good part about having alzheimer's?

You can hide your own easter eggs.

What's the best part of being an abortion doctor?

The free lunch.

This joke may have profanity.

What's the best part about taking a shower with an 11 year old girl?

If you slick her hair back, she looks like an 8 year old boy.

What's the best part of a pregnancy joke?

The delivery.

What's the best part about having a blind partner?

You know they won't be seeing other people.

Why do black's have white skin on the bottom of their feet and the palm of their hands?

Everyone needs a little bit of good inside them.

What's the best part about being a mute?

It goes without saying...

Why do crows do vocal exercises every morning?

For the Good of the Caws.

What does the head of the Catholic Church used to buy goods online?

Papal

What's the best part of dating 28 year olds?

There's 20 of them!

What is the best name for an acrobat?

Phillip

How do you tell a good monster from a bad one?

If it's a good one you will be able to talk about it later!

What's the best part about twenty two year old wheels of cheese?

There are twenty of them.

What's the best part about taking advice from r/relationships ?

You'll never have to worry about being in a long-term relationship.

What's the best name for an atheist?

Godfrey

What's the best part of Christmas for Santa Clause?

He knows where all the naughty girls live #*( )*

What's the best part about banging Jessica Alba?

You'll know if she was faking it.

What's the best part about showering with a 7 year old girl?

You slick their hair back and you've got a 7 year old boy.

Why do successful lettuce farmers always get women?

Because everyone knows they give good *head*.

What's the best name for a cigarette company?

TOBA Co

What's the best part of a baker's body?

Their buns.

What's the best part about gardening?

Getting down and dirty with your hoes.

What was the best part about Narcos Season 2?

SPOILERS Tata, Pablo Escobar

What's the best side of the house to build a deck on?

The outside

What's the best part about golf?

It's the only activity where you actually aim for the hole under 18 and you don't go to jail.

What's the best part about having multiple personality disorder?

Banging your best friend's wife every night!

What's the best part about twenty eight year olds?

There's twenty of them.

What's the best part about being cremated?

Finally achieving a smokin' hot body.

What's the best part about living in Switzerland?

I don't know, but the flag is a big plus

What's the best part of a redneck brothel?

The family discount

What's the best part about dating twenty two year olds?

There are 20 of them.

What's the best part about Switzerland?

I don't know, but their flag's a plus.

What's the best part of running a marathon?

Ha! You actually thought I ran a marathon! Jokes on you, I'm just drunk!

Why are ophans no good at baseball?

They dont know where home is.

What's the best part about going to a concert in Paris?

Free Shots

What's the best part of twenty eight year old chicks?

There's twenty of them.

What's the best part about being a meth addict?

3 sleeps 'til Christmas

What's the best part about living in a black family?

You never have to hear a dad joke. Edit. Just thought of this at work one day hope it's not a repost

What's the best part about a Fight Club joke?

The punchline.

What's the best part about marrying a farmer?

You get to grow old together.

What's the best part of dating a quadriplegic?

Spinning her like a top when she rides you cowboy style.

Why doesn't the Kentucky Fried Chicken use toilet paper?

It's finger licking good.

Whats the best part about sleeping with a midget?

You're sure to get a little head

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Holocaust Jokes More Holocaust Jokes

What's worse than 1 slice of burnt toast?

The holocaust.

Why would the Holocaust have failed if the victims were Islamic?

Because it would have been impossible to get a Muslim to take a shower.

Heaven Jokes More Heaven Jokes

Why do only 10% of men make it to heaven?

Because if they all went, it would be Hell.

Why did the bear start playing music when the priest tried to absolve him of his sins?

Because the priest said "Bear, atone" and the bear thought he said "baritone" as in "play the baritone sax now". The bear immediately started wailing away on the sax, rocking back and forth so hard he knocked over all the prayer candles and almost snapped his own spine. All the priest could do was ask the lord for the strength needed to get this bear into heaven.

Michael Jokes More Michael Jokes