What's the worst part about locking your keys in your car in front of an abortion clinic?

Going in to ask for a coat hanger

This joke may have profanity.
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Car Jokes More Car Jokes

What do you call the action where a dead guy falls out of a car and you have to put him back in?

A rehearsal

What do you call a duck addicted to crack?

A quack head. What is a ducks favorite snack Quackers. Why couldn't the duck drive his car His windshield was quacked.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What does a piano, tuna, and a bucket of glue have in common?

You can tuna piano but you can't piano a tuna! Don't ask me about the bucket of glue though... I've been stuck there for a while

What's a magazine?

asked every guy under 30.

Coat Jokes More Coat Jokes

What do locking the keys in your car and getting your girlfriend pregnant have in common?

both can be solved with a coat hanger

What kind of coat does a vampire wear in the rain?

A wet one.

Bad Jokes More Bad Jokes

What is the worst part about going to Auschwitz?

Your dreams are not the only thing going up in smokes.

What's the worst part about Tupac's new sitcom?

The Holocaust. (pun, hologram deal)

Lock Jokes More Lock Jokes

What was the internet like in the old days?

Me: *opens door* *pushes 16 outside* *locks door*

How do you prove that your dog loves you more than your wife?

Lock them both in the trunk of the car for an hour, then open it up and see which one of them is happier to see you.

Key Jokes More Key Jokes

Where's the dog?

flashback to me giving him the keys to the car to get more beer* ME: I let him outside.

Why can't blondes finish software updates?

They can never find the "any" key.

Abortion Clinic Jokes More Abortion Clinic Jokes