Why can't a vegetable win an argument?

Cuz he always uses a straw, man!

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What kind of operating system do horses use?

None. Horses are not known to use operating systems nor computers for that matter.

How does a hipster measure out his drugs?

Using instagrams.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What do you call a man with a large flatfish on his head?

Ray!

Why doesn't men use make-up or perfume?

Because we're beautiful and smell good!

Win Jokes More Win Jokes

What's better than winning a silver in the paralympics?

Being able to walk.

Why'd the farmer win the lifetime achievement award?

Because he was always out standing in his field.

Vegetable Jokes More Vegetable Jokes

What do root vegetables do at tha club?

Turnip

How do you know when your vegetables are boiled?

Their wheelchair floats to the top.

Argument Jokes More Argument Jokes

What do you get when an argument occurs on a camping trip?

A tents atmosphere

How to win an argument with a deaf girl?

Turn off the lights.

Straw Jokes More Straw Jokes

What were the very first straws made of?

ANSWER: Straw.

What is a test tube baby's biggest fear?

Dingos with straws....!!