How do you tell who loves you more. Your wife or your dog?

Put both of them in the trunk of your car...drive around...open the trunk and see who is happy to see you.

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Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

What do Asians meeting up at their favorite Chinese take-out say?

Where my dogs at "

What do you get when you're agnostic, dyslexic, and an insomniac?

You stay up all night wondering if there's a dog.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What's the definition of a Polygamist?

Pupil: A parrot with more than one wife!

What did the necrophiliac get after his wife died?

Mourning wood.

Car Jokes More Car Jokes

Why didn't the piece of paper move out of the way when a car came speeding towards it?

Because it was stationary.

What kind of car did the German cowboy purchase?

Audi *tips hat*

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How can you tell a dog is a cool dog?

It swags its tail.

How do you keep a idiot occupied?

I will tell you how in my next post- Jk the answer's in one of the comments, look through every single one and you are destined to discover the answer.

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

What should you do when your ex-girlfriend stands in the spotlights?

Drive faster.

What's four inches long and drives women crazy?

A 100 dollar bill you pervert!

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

Why do geologists love sandwiches in the field?

Because they can get their whole grains.

What do you call two birds in love?

Tweethearts!

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

Why are aussie bogans and necrophiliacs the same?

They both want to crack open a cold one.

How do you give a quadriplegic a headache?

Ask him to hold open the elevator door

Trunk Jokes More Trunk Jokes

Why Aren't Elephants Allowed On The Beach?

Because they always blow their trunks off!

What does a tree do when it goes on vacation?

It packs its trunk and leaves.