Army Jokes

  • What do you call an army of corn?

    The Musket - ears

  • What's the motto of the Mexican army?

    An Army of Juan

  • What is an army of blue babies on horseback called?

    A navy infantry cavalry

  • Where do ants keep their armies?

    in their sleevies

  • What do you call 100,000 Frenchmen with their hands up?

    The Army.

  • Why did King Kong join the army?

    To learn about gorilla warfare.

  • What do you get if you cross a centipede and a chicken ?

    Enough drumsticks to feed an army !

  • What do you call saplings in the army?

    the infantry

  • Why did the carpenter join the army?

    Because he wanted to be a Drill Sergeant

  • What do you call a group of pillaging Huns?

    An army of Hun-dread.

  • What's the us army tanksman's favorite song?

    Tanks for the memories"!

  • Why do parents send their toddlers to the army for daycare?

    Because they're sending them to the infantry!

  • Why are there no guys named William serving in the army?

    Because they dislike the phrase "Fire at Will"

  • What military branch has the largest biceps?

    The Army.

  • Where does a shoulder work?

    In the army.

  • What did they tell the burger who enlisted in the Army?

    You've got no beef soldier!

  • Where did Napoleon keep his armies?

    IN HIS SLEEVIES! Best used with little kids, or followed by maniacal laughter.

  • Who's the healthiest member of the Army?

    General Wellbeing

  • Where do kings keep there armies?

    In their sleevies.

  • Where do generals keep their armies?

    in their sleevies

  • What do you call an army of gorilla soldiers?

    Boko Harambe.

  • Why did the pig join the Army?

    He heard the food was a mess.

  • Where does Napoleon keep his armies?

    In his sleevies.

  • Where does the army keep fish?

    In a tank.

  • Why did the army send so many women with PMS to the Persian Gulf?

    They fought like animals and retained water for 4 days.

  • What do you call 1000 soldiers with no legs?

    An army.

  • What do you call a farmer in the army?

    E.I. G.I Joe.

  • Why did Napoleon wear sleeves?

    For his armies

  • Wheree did the king keep his armies?

    IN HIS SLEEVIES LOL xp cuz it's like armies like babi talk for arms instead of an armie like a bunch of dudes w/ issues w/ theer masculinity np, glad i cud explain dis 2 u

  • What do you call a dentist in the army ?

    A drill sergeant !

  • What do you call corn that joins the army?


  • How far away is the US Army's website?

    Just a few klicks away.

  • What do you call someone in the army that knows the capital of every country on earth?

    General Knowledge

  • Where does the king keep his armies?

    In his sleevies!

  • What do you call an army of toddlers?


  • How are tigers like sergeants in the army ?

    They both wear stripes !

  • What do you call an army of lesbians?

    Militia Etheridge

  • Why did Shakespeare refuse to join the army?

    He didn't like the phrase fire at will!

  • How many volunteers do we have for the army?

    384 sir" "okay round them up" "400 sir"

  • Why does the army want to only recruit married men?

    Because they don't want a man lost!

  • Why do you want to participate in this guerrilla war?

    Me: picturing myself leading an army of gorillas into battle "Independence."

  • What does the Army call it's Muslim infantry units with vehicles?

    Mecca-nized infantry.