How can I help you today, Mr Simpson?

BART: I don't know where my hair starts

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know when you're too drunk to drive?

When you swerve to miss a tree and realize it was your air freshener

When birds fly in a 'V' formation, one arm of the V is usually longer than the other. Do you know why that is?

There are more birds on that side.

Start Jokes More Start Jokes

When do spare parts from Japanese cars start falling out of the sky?

When it's raining Datsun cogs.

What four letter word starts with F ends in K and if you can't get it you have to use your hands or fingers...?

A fork

Today Jokes More Today Jokes

What did Daniel Boone say to Davey Crocket when thousands of Mexicans charged at them at the Alamo?

Davey.... are we pouring concrete today "

How bad is the economy?

Twenty years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Today we have no cash, no hope and no jobs.

Hair Jokes More Hair Jokes

What's the difference between an Alto and a Tenor?

The Tenor doesn't have hair on his back.

How does the moon cut his hair?

Eclipse it.

Help Jokes More Help Jokes

What will Tesla build this christmas to help santa deliver presents?

An elf driving car

Why did the dyslexic escapologist join the International Socialists?

A. because he wanted to help untie the human race.

Simpson Jokes More Simpson Jokes

What do you call someone who doesn't like The Simpsons?

A Homerphobe! LOL! Just made that up!

How can I help you today, Mr Simpson?

BART: I don't know where my hair starts

Bart Jokes More Bart Jokes

How can I help you today, Mr Simpson?

BART: I don't know where my hair starts

Who's there ! Bart ! Bart who ?

Bart-enders serve drinks !