Why do women live longer than men?

Shopping never causes heart attacks, but paying the bill does!

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Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What's the motto of the Polish Solidarity Union?

A: Every man for himself.

When a hot blonde walks in. The one lawyer says, "Man, wouldn't you like to screw that?

and the other lawyer replies, "Outta what "

Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

Why don't poor people go to funerals?

They can't afford to pay respects.

Why do we have to sit at red lights if nobody's coming the other way?

We don't have to pay our taxes if nobody's checking, right

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What do you call a woman with her tongue out?

A lesbian with a hard on.

What did the homeless man say to the woman who asked if he wanted 20$?

Yeah.

Live Jokes More Live Jokes

What kind of house does Fonzie live in?

An "A" frame...

Whoa. There are books on TAPE?

Now I can stop reading while I drive. This is gonna save so many lives.

Bill Jokes More Bill Jokes

Why did Timmy fall off his bike?

Because Bill threw a mattress at him.

Why doesn't Monica Lewinsky like going to the doctor?

He always shoves a Bill down her throat!

Cause Jokes More Cause Jokes

What's a Jackhammer's Best Friend?

Cast Steel! Bahahahahah! You know! Cause it has a poor dampening value it vibrates so much! They um. They both vibrate. Well ok. One vibrates, the other reciprocates. That's kinda... Hehe. Heh. Reciprocate my humor damn it!

Why do graveyards have fences?

Cause everyone's dying to get in!

Shopping Jokes More Shopping Jokes

Where did the ghost go shopping?

At the BOO-tique

Why do women live longer than men?

Shopping never causes heart attacks, but paying the bill does!

Heart Attack Jokes More Heart Attack Jokes

What happens when an American has a heart attack and survives?

A 'murical.

Why didn't the American get the burger?

because the heart attack got him first.