Adam Jokes

  • What did Adam say to his wife on the day before Christmas?

    It's Christmas, Eve!

  • What did Adam say to Eve on the day before Christmas?

    It's Christmas, Eve."

  • Why can't you trust an Adam?

    They make up everything.

  • Who's there ! Adam ! Adam who ?

    Adam up and tell me the total !

  • What was the first thing Adam said to Eve?

    Stand back! I don't know how big it's going to get!

  • Why did Eve bite the forbidden apple?

    Because it tasted better than Adam's banana.

  • Who were the first people not to read the apple ToC?

    Adam and Eve

  • Why is Adam known as the first accountant?

    He turned a leaf and made an entry.

  • What did Adam say the day before Christmas?

    It's Christmas, Eve!

  • Who was the worlds first capenter?

    Eve, she made Adam's banana stand.

  • How do we know that Adam and Eve weren't black?

    You can't take a rib from a black man

  • What didn't Adam and Eve have that everyone else has?

    Parents.

  • What was the first treacherous thing said?

    Adam you gotta try this!

  • How do we know Adam & Eve weren't black?

    You ever tried taking a rib from a black man

  • What did Adam say to Eve on Christmas?

    It's Christmas, Eve.

  • How Do We Know That Adam Wasn't Black?

    Have you ever tried to take a rib from a black man

  • What is one of the first things that Adam and Eve did after they were kicked out?

    A. They really raised Cain.

  • What did Adam do when he wanted some sugar?

    He raised Cain.

  • What makes fish smell?

    One fine morning in Eden, God was looking for Eve, but couldn't find them. God saw Adam and asked where Eve was? Adam replied, "She's down at the Ocean, taking a bath." "Damn," says God, "now all the fish will smell."

  • What did Adam say to Eve the first time he got an erection?

    Stand back, I don't know how big this thing is gonna get!"

  • How do you know that Adam and Eve were white?

    Have you ever tried taking a rib from a black man

  • What excuse did Adam give to his children as to why he no longer lived in Eden?

    A. Your mother ate us out of house and home.

  • Who was the world's first carpenter?

    Eve, because she made Adam's banana stand.

  • Why are there so many Asians?

    Its the food. There is too much raw dog. Heard it on Adam Carolla's Podcast. A caller phoned in and told it to Adam. Thought you guys would like it.

  • What is Adam's brother called?

    Subtractem

  • What time of day was Adam born?

    Just a little before Eve

  • What were Adam's first ever words to Eve?

    Stand back - I don't know how big it's going to get!"

  • What where Adam's first words to Eve?

    Don't wash it in there, you'll make the fish smell like that!"

  • What did adam say to eve?

    Let's save humanity.

  • What do you call the day before Christmas Eve?

    Christmas Adam

  • What did the snake day to Adam after he bit the apple?

    You owe Eve an O.

  • How do we know that Adam wasn't a black man?

    Have you ever tried taking a rib from a black man!! !

  • Who was the first carpenter?

    Eve, she made Adam's banana stand.

  • Where is the first baseball game in the Bible?

    In the big inning. Eve stole first, Adam stole second. Cain struck out Abel. The Giants and the Angels were rained out.

  • How do we know God likes condoms?

    Because Adam was ribbed for Eve's pleasure

  • How did Adam and Eve feel when expelled from the Garden of Eden?

    A. They were really put out.

  • What did Adam say when he broke up with Eve?

    I'm turning over a new leaf.

  • Who was the first carpenter ever?

    Eve, she made Adam's banana stand.