Prefer Jokes
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What do you prefer, honey?
A smart woman or a beautiful woman -Neither sweetie, you know I only have eyes for you
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Why do elephants prefer peanuts to caviar?
Because they're easier to get at the ballpark.
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Why do waiters prefer elephants to flies?
Have you ever heard anyone complaining of a elephant in their soup .
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What music do cats prefer?
Deadmau5
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Why do Asians prefer Sony?
Because it's a stereo type
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Why do girls prefer to drive auto cars, instead of manual?
Because they want the D.
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What kind of body do you want to have?
ME: *leans in close* I'd prefer human
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Why do rabbits prefer IPA's over other kinds of beers?
Because they use extra hops
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Why don't vikings send e-mails?
They prefer to use Norse code.
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Why don't English teachers like parole?
They prefer complete sentences.
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Why women prefer devils instead of angels?
Because devils are horny.
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What famous hotel chain do muslims prefer when travelling on religious holidays?
Ramadamadan.
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Why do women prefer old gynecologists?
Their shaky hands!
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What kind of eggs do Canadians prefer?
Grade eh
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How many bros does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They prefer Natural Light.
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Why do Canadians prefer their jokes in hexadecimal?
Because 7 8 9 A.
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How many bros does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They prefer Natural Light.
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Which composer do lumberjacks prefer to listen to?
Chopin
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What salad dressing does Macaulay Culkin prefer?
Neverland Ranch.
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Why do pirates prefer black women?
They love booty.
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Why do mathematicians dislike cloth rugs?
They prefer fur mats.
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How many isolationists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, they prefer to live in the dark.
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Which is better a stool or a box to stand on?
You stand on a stool, though I prefer the ladder
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What's Alex's (from 'A Clockwork Orange') preferred type of light?
Ultraviolent
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What do you call someone who strictly prefers white rice over brown rice?
A goddamn riceist
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Why do black cats never shave ?
Because 8 out of 10 cats prefer whiskas !
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Why do elephants prefer cars instead of motorcycles?
motorcycles don't have trunks
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Why do Canadians prefer their jokes in hexidecimal?
Because 7 8 9 A
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What style of art was preferred by the Third Reich?
Post-Imprussianist.
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When you guys describe me to your families do you use the word tigress?
I'd prefer if you included tigress
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How many frat boys does it take to change a light bulb?
None, they prefer natural light
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Why do old people prefer to live in one story houses?
There close to the ground.
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What kind of dog do IT people prefer?
A Dobie
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What gas do snails prefer?
Shell.
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What movie aspect ratio do cats prefer?
Litterbox.
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What flavor gum does the President prefer?
Governmint Ill walk myself to the nearest border
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Why do people prefer shooting stars to vegetables?
Because they're meteor
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What sort of perfume do snakes prefer ?
Poison by Christian Dior !
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How does Sherlock prefer his tea?
Steeped in mystery!
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What do you prefer, flat or sparkling?
Him: Water Me: No, my personality.
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What is the most popular hacking tool preferred by hackers in Bangladesh?
machetes
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Why don't they have bars in Syria?
Because, they prefer to get bombed at home.
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Why do hipsters prefer to drink their PBR warm?
So that they can say they liked it before it was cool.
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When lesbians get married, which one makes the sandwiches?
Neither! Everyone knows they prefer hot pockets
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What do you call a pig sitting on a hog?
Usually they prefer to be called "officer"
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What's the difference between Jared from Subway's gut and his junk?
He prefers his gut when it's down 45 pounds, and his junk when it's up 45 pounds.
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Why did the sweet scented man called Paul change his name to Saul?
He liked the P, but preferred the essence the change.
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Why do cowboys prefer wienie dogs?
So they can get a long little doggie.
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Why do men prefer blondes?
Men always like intellectual company
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Which do Catholic priests like betterapples or cherries?
Neitherthey prefer boysenberries.
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What type of fruit do twins prefer?
Pears.
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Why don't cats like online shopping?
They prefer a cat-alogue.
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Why do buzzards prefer to fly?
Because they really like their carry-on..... yeah total dad joke, i know.
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Why do blondes prefer the pill instead the condom?
Because it's waaay easier to swallow
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When you go for a bus ride do you like sitting upstairs or downstairs?
I prefer to ride on top but it's very hard getting the horse up the stairs.
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Why don't mathematicians have degrees?
They prefer radians.
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How do you think the whole Deflategate situation feels to Tom Brady now?
Probably doesn't feel how he prefers it to...
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How do IT technicians prefer to be paid?
Cache in hand.
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What does a Pirate prefer to wear?
Doublet or nothing.
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What's an owl's favorite rock band?
Owls personally prefer the track list of Rock Band 2. Just a solid game.
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Why do 9 out of 10 bear moms prefer minivans over sedans?
All the extra cubholders.
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What flavor gum does a scientist prefer?
Exspearamint. inspired by the presidential gum joke.
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Why do slovaks don't like Czechs?
They prefer cash.
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Which anti-virus software do pirates prefer?
Avast, ye scurvy dogs!
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Which Shampoo They Preferred?
The Top Answers Was: Get The Hell Out Of My Bathroom!
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When you ask me a question, would you prefer the blank stare or the eye roll as a response?
I like to be prepared.
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Why don't terrorists shop at Walmart?
They prefer a Target.
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Why do athletes prefer nuns to time their laps?
Because when a nun times anything it's zero. (0*n=0) :D
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How do tennis players prefer their steak?
Wimbledon and nicely served.
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What two letters of the alphabet do snowmen prefer ?
I.C. !
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Why does Gandalf prefer coupes?
Because other cars have Mordor.
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What kind of donuts did Bob Marley prefer?
The ones with Jam in
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What kinds of vegetables did Ghandi prefer?
Peace and carrots... Thought this up at work today. I'm sure it's been done before but it made me chuckle...
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Why do ladies prefer 77 over 69?
Because it's eight more.
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How does the modern-day James Bond prefer his women?
Shaven, not furred
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What clothing designer do vampires prefer to wear?
Alexander Fang
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What kind of cake does a baseball player prefer?
A bundt cake!
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Why do differentiating mathematicians prefer Manhattans to Mojitos?
Ryes over rum.
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What do a baby and a martini have in common?
I prefer both of them shaken
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Why do Muslim extremists prefer to drink cappuccino?
Because they hate french press.
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What does a stripper and a Subway sandwich maker have in common?
They both prefer to be called "artists" instead of what they really are.
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What is the preferred drink for people in St. Cloud?
Mini Soda
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What shampoo do dragons prefer?
Head & Smolders
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Why doesn't Sean Connery have any grown up children?
He prefers them shaken, not stirred.
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Why do women prefer 77 more than 69?
Because they get 8 (ate) more. Repurposed from a comment.
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How does ISIL prefer their eggs?
Sunni side up at first. But they always end up scrambled.
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What kind of jean's do Mario prefer?
Denim Denim Denim.
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Why does ACDC prefer Android to Apple?
She's Got The Jack
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Why did the witch get a car with manual transmission?
Because she prefers to drive stick!