Middle Jokes
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Why put a baseball bat up when you can just lay it down on a stair in the middle of the stairway?
What could go wrong " My son apparently
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Whats the similarity between Monkey in the Middle and Football?
Both of the groups that are concered about the health of someone playing both begin with the letter P.
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What do you do if a cow is in the middle of the road you're driving on?
steer clear
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Why was 10 scared?
because he was in the middle of 9-11! Better phrasing recommendations appreciated :-)
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Why is the letter N the most powerful letter?
Because it is in the middle of TNT.
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Why did 10 die?
Because it was in the middle of 9 11
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Why was the virgins' wedding during the middle of the week?
Because Wednesday is hump day.
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What 2 things do Winnie the Pooh and John the Baptist have in common?
They both ate honey and they both have the same middle name.
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What's it called when a huge hole opens up in the ground in the middle of Spring?
Sinkhole de Mayo
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What's that pig doing in the middle of the road with a red light on its head?
Didn't you tell me to put out a stop swine
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What do Kermit the Frog and Henry the VIII have in common?
Same middle name.
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Why do traffic lights turn red?
You would too if you had to change in the middle of the street!
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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean?
Bob
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What do you call a girl who stands in the middle of a tennis court?
Annette.
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What do you call a 5'10" fortune teller parked in the middle of a divided highway?
A medium medium on the median.
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Why did the light turn red?
You would too if you were caught changing in the middle of the street!
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What do you call a fart in the middle of the night? What do you call a fart in the mourning?
A midnight snack A hot Breakfast
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What do you call a town in the middle of the Arctic Ocean?
An Iceburgh.
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What did the confused Mackem say when he discovered that he was smack bang in the middle of Newcastle?
I'm in the middle of *no Wear*
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What do Winnie the Pooh and Ivan the Terrible have in common?
The same middle name. (Shamelessly stolen from Cortana.)
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Whats in the middle of girl's leg ?
And the answer is, 'Knee'
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Why is your nose in the middle of your face?
Because it's the scenter!
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What do you call a boy with no arms and legs in the middle of the ocean?
Bobby
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What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and your TV is floating?
Man, wall mounts are awesome."
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What did the left leg say to the right leg?
A: That one in the middle thinks he's hard.
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What is the most beautiful thing in the world?
Is it your right thigh, or your left? Or does the answer lie somewhere in the middle?
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Why is 10 traumatized forever?
Because he was right in the middle of 9-11.
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What was the blond doing in the middle of the sea?
Bouncing on a buoy (boy)
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What do you do when you see a floating T.V. in the middle of the night?
Tell Jamal to drop it
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Why did the opossum cross the road?
To get to the middle.
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What's worse than stepping on a Lego in the middle of the night?
A landmine.
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What goes round the middle of the Internet?
The e-quator.
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How do you play a big game of Hungry Hippos?
Go to a weight watchers meeting and roll Maltesers down the middle of their meeting circle.
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What do you call a Punjabi fellow stuck in the middle of a shark-filled ocean?
Amandeep trouble.
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What do you call an elephant creeping through the jungle in the middle of the night ?
Russell !
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What does a blonde and a shotgun have in common?
You break them at the middle and load them from behind
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What starts with N, has two Gs in the middle, and has no business wearing a pointy white hood?
Your noggin
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What do you call a dead baby floating in the middle of the ocean?
Bait.
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What takes longer to run, first to second, or second to third?
Second to third, because there's a short stop in the middle!
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What do Winnie the Pooh and Jack the Ripper have in common?
The same middle name.
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How do u tell the population of a small native village?
throw a bunch of pocket change in the middle of town. How do u tell who is the richest person in that village? Find the person who gathered the most change.
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What do you call a girl who stands in the middle of a bowling alley?
Elaine
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What has an R at the beginning, a T at the end, and EPOS in the middle?
Most of the jokes in this subreddit.
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What's your middle name?
Why are you single What's wrong with your big toe
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What do college students and deer have in common?
A: They both stand in the middle of the road and stare at your headlights.
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What did the right testlcle say to the left?
Look at this guy in the middle trying to act all hard
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How can you tell if you're in Detroit or across the river in Windsor Ontario Canada?
Stand in the middle of the street. If someone yells, "hey, get out of the street" you're in the US. If they yell, "get out of the street, eh" you're in Canada
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What's big, white and goes down on you in the middle of the night?
An Airbus A320.
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What has a beginning and an end, but nothing in the middle?
Life.
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What do Winnie the Pooh and Attila the Hun have in common?
The same middle name.
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Why did the reporter only dunk chips in the middle of the dip?
He just wanted the inside scoop.
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Why can't a dog clap in the middle of a movie?
Because it keeps hitting pause.
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What do you call a budget that's cut short from the middle?
A midget.
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How much is half of 8?
Pupil: Up and down or across Teacher: What do you mean Pupil: Well up and down makes a 3 or across the middle leaves a 0!
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What did Gordon Ramsey shout angrily at his girlfriend?
IT'S ALL PINK IN THE MIDDLE"
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Where's the middle of nowhere?
It's three letters in. "H".
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What do you call a swimming hole in the middle of a farm?
A rural pool.
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What do Kermit the Frog and Henry the Eighth have in common?
They share the same middle name.
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What do you call a bear in the middle of the road?
A bear-icade
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What's in the middle of girls' legs?
Their knee.
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Whats the best place to drive to in Iowa?
The Middle. That way, you're always driving out of Iowa.
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What do you call a dog in the middle of a muddy road ?
A mutt in a rut !
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What do you call a girl who's sitting in the middle of a tennis court?
Annette.
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What sits in the middle of the world wide web ?
A very very big spider !
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What do John the Baptist and Winnie the Pooh have in common?
They have the same middle name!
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Why is the letter T like an island?
Because its in the middle of water!!!
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What do Atilla the Hun and John the Baptist have in common?
Their middle name.
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How much is half of 8 Pupil: Up and down or across ?
Teacher: What do you mean Pupil: Wellup and down makes a 3 or across the middle leaves a 0
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How can you ever be late for anything in London?
They have a huge clock right in the middle of the town.
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How can you tell which end of a worm is which ?
Tickle it in the middle and see which end laughs !
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Why was Snape in the middle of the road?
So you would never know what side he was on.
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What does a dancing piece of land in the middle of nowhere?
Plot twisting!
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Why did Snape stand in the middle of the road?
A: So you'll never know which side he's on.
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Why did the bodybuilder stop in the middle of the road?
They ran out of juice!
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What's high in the middle and round on both ends?
Ohio.
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Why did Silly Sue throw her guitar away ?
Because it had a hole in the middle.
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What does Rupert the Bear and Jack the Ripper have in common?
Same middle name!
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What's a swear word?
Me: A bad word moms and dads only say when they're mad.3:Me:3: Is my middle name a swear word
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What do you call a man in the middle of the ocean with no arms or legs?
Bob
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What do you call a big white bear with a hole in his middle ?
A polo bear !
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What do you call a woman standing in the middle of at tennis court?
Annette!
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What do you call an elephant that lies across the middle of a tennis court ?
Annette !
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How can you tell a bagpiper with perfect pitch?
A. He can throw a set into the middle of a pond and not hit any of the ducks.
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Why did the programmer's girlfriend move back home so quickly?
She returned because all he ever did was split her in the middle for log(n) time.
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What would be your reply?
Someone stops you in the middle of the road and asks you to tell him a good joke, What would be your reply?